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Are there any other moms who think like I do?

I would much rather have happy kids than a clean house. Between my five month old and four year old, every waking second is consumed by them. Don't get me wrong, my house isn't a toxic hazard, but it sure isn't spotlessly clean. To me the time I spend cleaning is time spent not with my LOs. So instead of washing dishes right away I read books or go for a walk with my kids. For example, yesterday my DH was off work so I could have spent the day cleaning and have him care for the kids, instead we packed up and spent the day at the zoo. Sure my carpet is unvaccumed, but my son LOVED every minute of the zoo and we have the pictures and memories forever.
Does anyone else feel this way? It seems like most of the other moms I know IRL are so concerned with their home being clean. If it is dirty they are not happy. I am always curious what the kids are doing while mom is cleaning. Keeping a house clean all the time is time consuming.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:24 AM on May. 24, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (39)
  • it's a trade off. you have to sacrifice some of both imho. if you clean too much you miss out on your kids. if you don't clean enough youre not teaching your kids responsibilty and not providing the best household/childhood that you could

    Answer by gabenmikeysmom at 6:12 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • I'm with you but my husband can't stand a messy house so I try to compromise. I will clean during the kids naps or get my toddler involved. He loves to help and I get to spend time with him while my infant sleeps. We make a game out of it.


    Answer by RedSeal at 6:20 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • Its sad cause I really really really wish that I was this way!!! I have tried to fix it though... instead of making everyday a cleaning like crazy day... I use wednesdays as my cleaning day! Its hard for me cause mess STRESSES me out completely!!! I clean a little here and there, but my whole day for cleaning is wednesdays... during that time, my kids help and when their cleaning is done, they get to play outside!!! Its a team effort!!! But yeah, I wish that I was less on freaking out about cleaning and more on hanging out with my kids!!! (sigh)

    Answer by sxc_mom_of2 at 7:18 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • I have a extremely clean house and an overly happy child. She is 8 months and loves chasing the broom and vacuum. She follows me around when I clean or I do it when she is sleeping. I refuse to have a messy house and use her as the reason behind it. My husband is a pig and destroys the house within minutes of coming in from work so my job as a SAHM is to make sure the house is clean and that laundry is done and if that means my child fusses for a few minutes while I am upstairs doing laundry then so be it. Once she lays down I make the beds, clean the bathrooms and things like that. I can do the dishes and other things with her awake.

    Answer by brailynsmama08 at 7:23 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • WHile she is awake. Sorry huge grammar error there.

    Answer by brailynsmama08 at 7:25 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • You remind me of one of those mom's on wifeswap. You know the one's that America thinks is a slob..

    Answer by sarapurser at 7:47 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • I feel the same way as you do. I am not obsessive with cleaning anything. If I do it today, fine, if not...there's always tomorrow or the next day. I don't worry about what other people think either, or how other people do things. :)

    Answer by summerdayz at 8:04 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • Well, I think theres moderation in everything. You are definitely not a slob. Here my thing...if my toilets are clean, counters free of clutter and dishes out of sight, floors mopped and vacuumed, then I am okay with the rest. Having one child is nothing and I would have no excuses because I would have so much free time on my hands, but I have 4 kids. I am hardly ever home so if we can keep it between the ditches then we're good. Its a good thing to start training the kids early to pick up after themselves. I think thats where moms miss it sometimes. I know I did. We feel like, oh I am the mom so I should clean everything....well, no, thats not true. My kids can destroy this house in just a few minutes. Not deliberately of course, but just by walking through, kicking off their shoes, laying down the book backs or putting down what was in their hands. Then it never gets picked back up. Also consider size of home too.

    Answer by momofsaee at 8:07 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • My son and I do things together, including the cleaning. He will stand on his chair by the sink and hand me each dish to rinse and then I let him start the dishwasher. I also let him stand on his chair beside the washer and hand him clothes to throw in there while I am throwing clothes in. I also give him a water squirt bottle (which looks very different from all the other cleaning bottles) so that he can "clean" the countertops or floors while I am with the real stuff. It's not like I force him to do these things, he's just busy by nature and it makes it more fun for both of us. I don't clean every day and my house can get to be a mess sometimes, but I don't want people dropping by to think we're trashy or anything so I try to at least pick up and get the big stuff off the floors every day. It's a personal choice though, if you feel you do enough and it works for your family then that is good for you!

    Answer by ajguinn at 8:14 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • I have three boys (if you include my husband!), so to not clean for more than a day, means my house would be classified as a HAZMAT zone! LOL

    I tidy up and "spot clean" constantly and/or as needed, but DETAILED cleanings...mopping, vacuuming, windows, bathrooms, kitchen, get done once a week.

    Now that my youngest will be starting full-day K in the fall, I will be going back to work as a substitute teacher full time, so I have decided since I will not be home during the daytime (when hubby is a work and the kids are at school) to clean, it will be worth it for me to have a cleaning service come in once a week to take care of the bigger DETAILED cleanings! :o)

    I don't mind kids clutter (toys, games, messy kids rooms) those things clean up easily, but I can't stand messy, sticky, muddy, hairy clean ups!!! Ewwww! LOL :o)

    Answer by LoriKeet at 8:18 AM on May. 24, 2009

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