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Anyone ot there that has 2 kids really close together and find themselves avoiding outings because its so stressful by yourself how do people do it?

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MoMMyto2971

Asked by MoMMyto2971 at 11:07 AM on May. 24, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 5 (87 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I actually have 3 kids under 5 years old. My oldest is 4 1/2, my middle is 21 months old and my youngest just turned 1. My middle and third are only 9 1/2 months apart (preemies). During the week we don't go anywhere without my husband. They run in the backyard or just turn my house upside down. Yesterday, I woke up early with my boys and took a walk down to CVS. I do have a double stroller and that helped but its just using the big thing in a small store like CVS. I made sure to go when they just opened up so it wouldn't be so packed.
    azn_ladie82

    Answer by azn_ladie82 at 11:17 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • I don't have 2 close together, but I remember avoiding outings cause it's no fun chasing kids around the whole time. Been there!!!
    April0040

    Answer by April0040 at 11:20 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • I had 3 kids under 3 years old and, yes, I avoided going out unless my husband was going with me because it was crazy. Even now that they are older I still avoid doing things with all of them alone. They are 8 (almost 9), 7 1/2, 6 1/2 and 3. We go for walks to the store a few blocks away but much more then that stresses me out because someone never listens. I never go away from home (like in the car) alone with them. Last time I did that was a trip to the doctor a year and a half ago and I left with a migraine and was ready to strangle several of the children. I told my husband I would not do doctor visits again and he has taken them to all their appointments since then (well, I went with him for the last one).
    I just don't deal well with stress and my kids were actually pretty well behaved as toddlers...it was just too much for me most of the time.
    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 11:32 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • yes its stressful but have hope it gets better. Depending on where you are going I found that using the stroller helped b/c I would just strap them in and keep going and I would only go to the grocery store with the carts that could handle 2 kids.
    Yes I had my come home crying days (try grocery store, toddler, and newborn that I ended up breastfeeding as I was shopping) BOY DID I CRY THAT DAY....
    but it gets better. I started learining the times of day that were better and the stores that were most accomodating.
    Now they are 5 and almost 4 its better.
    MamiJaAyla

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 11:41 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • I was terrified the first time I took my two out alone when my youngest was a newborn. (they are 2 years and 4 days apart) It was actually not that bad. And now that they are 2 and 4, it's actually pretty easy.

    Of course I had no choice but to take them out alone when my husband deployed again, when our youngest was 4 months old.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 11:51 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • I have four children ages 5,4,3,2 and one on the way and when they were younger it was insane but I did my best to keep them under control. My husband works monday through friday from 8am until 6pm so there isn't a whole lot that one can do when I have to go to the grocery store. I made sure that when we went anywhere that my kids KNEW that there would be consequences for bad behavior. Yes, it was a struggle and yes, there were times when screaming kids where being dragged through the store but hey, what can you do? Good luck!
    apattinson

    Answer by apattinson at 11:55 AM on May. 24, 2009

  • We went to a fest near our home one time while their dad stayed home and watched golf. Usually I would give "idle threats" to them and they knew that. So i finally decided to stand my ground and when they didn't listen to me i packed them back up in the van and went home. They screamed the whole ride(just across the street thankfully) home. I was so mad. they whined to daddy who i guess they thought would MAKE ME take them back. I said if he wants them to go back, he has to go with us. LOL

    Anyway, the point is, you have to be consistent and let them know that you mean business. And if you threaten to leave someplace, then leave. You can't be wishy washy. It took me a while, and was hard in the beginning but we can go pretty much anywhere now and they do listen to me. We actually sat at a buffet for 2 hours on Mothers day and they were soooooo good. :)

    Just stay persistent, you'll be glad you did. :)
    CinderAmethyst

    Answer by CinderAmethyst at 12:59 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • I have 2 kids 3 and a half years apart and I avoid going places alone with both! I have started doing it more but the good news is I'm learning that it can be done. With out anyone including me crying! I think no matter how close together they are it just takes practice. It defiantly sounds like you aren't alone in this. Anyway i agree a stroller really helps I can only imagine that it would help even more if they were close in age. I think you should just try a few things and find out what works and more importantly what doesn't. Give yourself plenty of time to get ready to leave the house. Try to have a bag that is always packed and ready to pick up. (Diapers,wipes extra clothes, snacks, juice boxes or water bottles, Tylenol and toys) When the kids are in bed restock for the next time. It saves a huge step in the getting out the door process.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 1:38 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • I have three 33 months apart total. 5 years, 3 1/2 years and 2 1/2 years. I go everywhere with them by myself.

    I'm trying to think now....no..while there are places I'd rather have help, I've never stayed home and not done something just because of it being 3-1.
    TiccledBlue

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 3:02 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • Your gonna think I'm a wimp because I just have one and I have the same problem. What I do is choose very carefully where and for how long we will go places. Places where toddler behavior is no big deal work really well for long periods of time.


    Places like the store may require DH or a babysitter. I always shake my head when I see moms who have to grocery shop with toddlers. It never fails that the kids is bored, crying and falling out of the cart.

    dreyamom

    Answer by dreyamom at 10:36 PM on May. 24, 2009

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