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Whats a good visitation schedule for an almost 4 & an almost 2 year old??

We're trying to find a good balance with my step sons spending time with both Mommy (who's been "stay-at-home" up until this point) and Daddy.

We're trying a 3-4-4-3 schedule right now. (3 days with dad, 4 days with mom, 4 days with dad, 3 days with mom, cont.) and that seems to be working but the almost 4 year old, will (hopefully) be starting school in the fall. We don't live too far apart and we're in the same school district, so that's not a problem, we just need to find a balance.

Any suggestions?

Any success or unsuccessful stories?

Answer Question
 
blu_ied_gurl

Asked by blu_ied_gurl at 11:18 PM on May. 24, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Do yall live near enough that the kids could sleep at mom's and their daddy could maybe take them to school / see the toddler in mornings or pick up from school?
    TXdanielly

    Answer by TXdanielly at 11:21 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • My best friend and her ex have a wierd schedule, but it works great for them. She has them every other weekend, and on the weekends dad has them, she has him monday evening. And she has him every wednesday, and the mondays she doesnt have him she has him on either tuesday or thursday. So it goes something like dad for friday, sat, and sun, mom on mon, dad tues, mom weddad thurs, mom fri, sat, sun, dad mon, mom tues, wed, dad thursday, repeat over again. It gets really confusing, but he is not away from either for very long. And they have always made sure that if something is going on and he says I want to go back to mom's, or dad's, they dont make him feel bad about it and immediately call and say hey he wants to spend some time with you. He never has to pick or choose whose feelings to hurt and I think that has made all the difference. The way it is they also have him on their days off every week too. hth
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:24 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • Daddy works all day. He owns his own IT business (computer technician). He's gone from 10a-5p most days. He can do quite a bit of what he has to do from home, so he isn't always gone, but as a general rule, hes gone. We have a nanny, and their mommy is having to get a job and is planning on going back to school in the spring, so she is going to have them in daycare when she has them. She doesn't want the oldest in full day school because she wants him to spend time at home still.
    blu_ied_gurl

    Answer by blu_ied_gurl at 11:26 PM on May. 24, 2009

  • when i went to court for this a couple years ago the judge wanted it to be 5days with mom, 5 days with dad, over and over..according to all the studies this judge has read on, that is what seems to work best for parents, and best for kids....i however couldnt agree to that..thats to much time apart, plus we live an hour away from each other so it wouldnt work for school anyways..but yaa..thats what the judge ideally wants/wanted
    alexis_06

    Answer by alexis_06 at 12:51 AM on May. 25, 2009

  • i think at that age the children should stay where they want as long as ya'll live close enough together. children at that age need both parents as much as possable
    singlemom14131

    Answer by singlemom14131 at 3:08 AM on May. 25, 2009

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