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Move in together?? Room mates and dating.....

I been dating this guy for a couple weeks, and we are looking long term, planning long term, but taking it slow, taking everything one day at a time...
Well hes been staying with his dad and his dad is moving now, so hes wanting to relocate- he lives 2 hours from me right now. hes wanting to move closer to me and is looking at getting into a big house- 4bd-and asked if me and my kids and my sister would like to move in with him- like room mates... We havent been dating very long so it wouldnt be awkward to live with him if things didnt work out, but if things were to work out great then wed already have a house together... we'd each have our own room, hed have his, id have mine,my sister gets a room, and my 2 boys would share a room...Do you think it would be a bad idea? my financial situation would improve immensly...but i dont want to do anything drastic that could turn out badly...what do you think?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:13 PM on May. 25, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • I don't think it's a good idea after just a couple weeks of dating. You all need your own spaces until you know each other better.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 4:56 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • I definitely wouldn't do it. You've been dating only a couple of weeks and he's lived long distance, how well do you know this guy? Guys and girls are always on their best behavior he first few weeks of dating, then after awhile you start to learn more about them and their bad habits and what they're really like. I think for yours and your kids safety, you should wait! JMO.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:17 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • I wouldn't, I think it's to soon! Have you ever seen him get mad or lose his temper yet? I would wait until I saw it to find out the worst you'll be dealing with. Would it be possible for him to move in with you for a few weeks and see how that goes before making up your mind?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:17 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • I am walking proof that moving in with someone you are dating as a room mate never works. The difference I dated that guy for about 4 months before I moved in, not just a couple of weeks. What kind of example are you giving your children by moving in with someone one you barely know.

    It will never be just a roommate thing after you two started having sex.

    Also, it is a bit psycho of the both of you to be planning a future together when you barely know eachother. Your whole situtation makes me think of a young naive highschool couple.
    dakotaNrye

    Answer by dakotaNrye at 3:22 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • -OP-
    He'd have to be working at a job for a couple weeks here before he could afford the deposit on the house- hed be staying with me during that time...
    I dont know about his Temper yet cause ive never seen him get that upset.... i know ive never caused him to get that upset....and i dont plan to....
    but that is a great point.
    We would be room mates if we were to do this... but we'd continue dating.... but im always afraid that since the lease would be in his name if things werent to work out, that me and my kids would have to find somewhere else to stay and start over..... he doesnt seem like hes that type of guy.... but im very protective of my kids.... im trying to list all the pros and cons of this kind of situation.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:23 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • I wouldn't do it, it already sounds like you think it's a bad idea.
    prettyrayray

    Answer by prettyrayray at 3:23 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • -OP- we been dating, but havent been together sexually. We both want to wait till the right time... to be in a steady relationship before we do...
    This way we can still have a good friendship if we decide we arent right for eachother.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:25 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • I wouldn't just move in with anyone, male or female, because I am over protective of my child. I would not not even entertain the thought of moving in with someone I just met because it would be better financially. Even the best of friends moving in together could be a catastrophic.

    Also, you are rambling about the perfect lives the two of you are planning together. Get out of the clouds and back into reality. You need to realize this is a decision that isn't about you, but your children as well.
    dakotaNrye

    Answer by dakotaNrye at 3:32 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • It would be a good idea if it was with another woman. The situation is more complex than it has to be and the future would be complicated whether it works out or not. If you become intimate, it isn't good to be having sex in the same house as your children and your sister. He needs to find other arrangments.
    happi-ladi

    Answer by happi-ladi at 3:37 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • i wouldnt do it, i made that mistake already... it causes nothing but drama
    sunshinebaby209

    Answer by sunshinebaby209 at 5:32 PM on May. 25, 2009

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