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I need a laugh...

Please tell me a joke or something funny that has happened to you. Please?

Answer Question
 
LaurenKaye29

Asked by LaurenKaye29 at 9:54 PM on May. 25, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 8 (261 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Ok, My DH & our 5 kids were all eating dinner one evening. My DS, then age 5, was quiet for a few minutes & then jumped out, stuck his paper napkin to his face, stood on his chair, & called out, "Look, I'm Santa Claus!!!"
    funnyface1204

    Answer by funnyface1204 at 10:00 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • My husband, Jeff, and I incurred several problems while assembling our new computer system, so we called the help desk. The man on the phone started to talk to Jeff in computer jargon, which confused us even more.

    "Sir," my husband politely said, "please explain what I should do as if I were a four-year-old."

    "Okay," the computer technician replied. "Son, could you please put your mommy on the phone?"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:01 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • While assembling furniture, my friend Debbie asked her roommate's five-year-old son to bring her a screwdriver.

    "Do you want a 'Daddy' screwdriver or a 'Mommy' screwdriver?" the little boy asked.

    Confused but preoccupied, Debbie absentmindedly said, "Bring me a 'Mommy' screwdriver."

    The child came back and handed her a butter knife.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:02 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • As a working mother with an office in my home, I pride myself on maintaining a professional image. One key to that image is my answering-machine greeting, which is often the first contact clients have with me. I worked on making it sound upbeat and enthusiastic, and thought I had succeeded until a friend left this message: "Judy, this is Pam. I love your greeting, but do you know that you can hear your little boy in the background saying, 'Mommy, I gotta go potty'?"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:02 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • To help a busy mother get away for a two-week vacation, my sister agreed to stay with the woman's three children. On the first evening, she cooked one of their favorite meals. To the youngsters' delight, dinner after dinner, she "guessed" what they liked. When my sister returned home, we asked her what the secret of her success was. "Each afternoon I would flip through the cookbook until I found a page that was ripped, smudged and food-splattered," she explained. "Then I would make that recipe. It worked every time!"
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:03 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • Aunt Karen is the mother of two high-spirited young girls. When I called her one morning, our conversation was constantly interrupted by the din of kids screaming and chasing each other. "Could you hold on for a moment?" my aunt finally asked, putting down the phone.

    Within ten seconds all I could hear was absolute silence. Then, "Okay, I'm back."

    "But it's so quiet!" I exclaimed. "You must have complete control over those two."

    "Not really," my aunt confessed wearily. "I'm in the closet."
    MadisonsMom0408

    Answer by MadisonsMom0408 at 10:04 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • my little girl stuck our kitty in the fridge today. not only was he a cold kitty but he also had his face in my chocolate cake!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:11 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • FARTING ALL THE TIME


    DOCTOR, "Doc,i've got the farts. I mean i fart all the time,"


    The Doctor nods, "hmm."


    PATIEN, "my fart do not stink and you can't hear them. its just that i fart all the time. look, we've been talking here for about 10 minutes and I've farted five time. you didn't hear them and you don't smell them, do you ?"


    "hmm," says the doctor,


    he picks up his pad and writes out a prescription.


    the patient is thrilled 'GREAT DOC. THIS PRESCRIPTION, WILL IT REALLY CLEAR UP MY FARTS?"


    "no," sighs the doctor, " the prescription is to clear your sinuses. next week i want you back here for a hearing test.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:15 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • True Doctors experiences, I found them on Criggo.com, One I remember was he asked a 90 year old bedridden patient "So how many years have you been bedridden" she did a doubletake and exclaimed "Oh, lord let me see, of course it was before my husband died and that was 40 years ago".
    Gigi1969

    Answer by Gigi1969 at 10:17 PM on May. 25, 2009

  • What comes after 69?


    Usually 70 right?


    Wrong, mouthwash..lmao


    Some old lady in a home told that one to my SO's sister lol
    MammaBella

    Answer by MammaBella at 10:46 PM on May. 25, 2009

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