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WHAT MOM HAD TO CUT THE CORDS OF ADULT KIDS APPLY TOUGH LOVE AND WHAT IS OR WAS THE OUTCOME? ARE U GLAD U DID IT? IF NO WHY NOT?

I WILL BE CUTTING MY SON'S CORD OF SUPPORT, FINANCIALLY AND EMOTIONALLY BASED ON HIS DISRESPECT, DISOBEDIENCE AND FOR FAILING TO GRADUATE, PLUS DISCONTINUE HIS THERAPY. HE'S MY ONLY CHILD AND I AM NOT LYING WHEN I STATE JUNE 30TH 09 IS THE DAY I VACATE AND HE TOO. THE NEW RULES AND OPTIONS I HAVE GIVEN HIM HAVE FALLEN ON DEATH EAR. HE WANTS HIS CONTINUED CAKE AND FROSTING FOREVER MORE AND HAS DONE A GREAT JOB IN MAKING ME FEEL GUILITY. TOUGH LOVE IS TOUGH! CSJOY

 
csjoy1

Asked by csjoy1 at 12:56 PM on May. 26, 2009 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 10 (450 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • He may say he hates you, he may go away for a spell...but some day he should come back a man that respects you for doing the right thing. I dont think you should cut off all contact with him, but he may cut it off with you. Keep the door open for relationship but you guys will have to relate in a new way. Good luck to you!!!
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 10:21 AM on May. 27, 2009

  • u should not cut off ur only child completly- especially if he needs theraphy- what if he tries to hurt himself- u should not financially pay his bills , but do not cut off ur child ever from ur life.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:59 PM on May. 26, 2009

  • Anonymous: You are correct in stating not to cut off my only child from my life, and I will always be close at hand should he need me, but right now and for the last year he's cut me completely off his life, only needing me when he's financially wanted something. It will be a on going process and hope that bumping him off the nest does not bring the worst but hopefully the better. Like him realizing that the grass is not any greener on the otherside and that it's time for him to grow up even if he doesn't want too. I do thank you for your comment, I do hear what you stated and will keep it close to my heart. I Love TJ more than I can state and feeling very sad at this moment with anger too boot. csjoy
    csjoy1

    Answer by csjoy1 at 1:12 PM on May. 26, 2009

  • I can't speak from personal experience, but my dad had to give all of us some "tough love". My brother was running up bills and acting irresponsible. He dropped out of college. He had a beautiful truck that he had gotten new and it was almost paid off. he couldn't afford the last few payments. My dad told him to sell it, that he would not give him anymore money. We all cried. i never new how my dad could hug us and say he loves us but stand there made of steel..he didn't back down. Financially it would have been wiser to keep the truck with only a few pamyts left, but my dad said it was in bens' interest to learn a lesson...it was never about the money. I have always admired my dad for doing what's right, not what we want...but always take the path that is best for your child. I encourage you to sit down and tell your son that you love him with all your heart and you wont enable him anymore! cont.
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 10:13 AM on May. 27, 2009