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What should I do....About a step son and Behavior issues.

I have a 10 yr old step son who my husband has residential custody of.But maybe the last 3 yrs he has been on a weird shift at work.So my step son is at his moms during the week and with us on every other weekend.Well we are having problems with Bedwetting and telling lies.He seems to be getting worse.Well my husband is at work from 2pm till mid every day and his mom also works alot and I also work.Well
his Mom is at a point where she can't deal with him.And He wont listen to me.And my husband thinks his problem is he wants to be with us.And his mom really sometimes could care less.So if his mom seems to be (unable to deal with him) Is it fair to leave him with me while my husband isn;t home and his Mom is home but not willing to work with him.AND LEAVE ME TO DEAL WITH HIS BEHAVIOR PROBLEMS?????I do not know what to do.I have older children out of school.And I dont mind,but his mom & Dad just wants to do for their self .

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kassi09

Asked by kassi09 at 6:30 AM on May. 28, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • I hardly ever suggest this but I would get a referral from his doc for a , a , a therapist. It even feels strange to see me type it. He has issues he needs help resolving and you are at a loss for solutions so, get him some help.. GL.
    KARRIEMARIE

    Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 6:35 AM on May. 28, 2009

  • I think the boy likes you more than his mom... he's acting out. Mabey he's trying to get her to "get rid" of him at your house? I'd talk to the boy, really. I'd just ask if there's anything bothering him, if he's happy, if he even wants to talk about anything... don't think he needs a therapist... he needs an adult who loves him, wants him around, and wants to talk to him.
    Gremlyn

    Answer by Gremlyn at 6:46 AM on May. 28, 2009

  • The bed wetting can be resolved. But the other problem is a little more challenging. Ask you self this? When you got with his dad do you act like a parent to the little boy or do you treat him like friend? My daughter was lying at one time and still does so I had to put a hold of the stituation and not give her any priviliages and just give her some tuff love so I am in everything she is doing and right know she is becoming aware that I am not going to take her crap. If you have tryed keeping this relationship like a friend then continue and dont over step your boundaries but If you have treated him like a son then I would suggest not to give up on him.cause I sure you know parenting is a hard but rewarding job in it self.figure out what his mom and dad want to do with him then make suggestion. Or if possible talk to his parents and make a team effort and let them know your concerns about his behavior and his lying issue.
    C.F

    Answer by C.F at 7:52 AM on May. 28, 2009

  • when my daughter started lying and it became a problem for me and her dad. I sat down with the dad and told him what she was doing. see me and the dad are not to gethere so she was causing me and him to get into arugments. so I told him that she is getting a bad habit about lyin to us both. if I told her she couldnt do something she would call her dad and ask him for permission and then I would get on her case and she would say that her dad gave her permission. which in my case no excause. She know that me and her dad are teaming up against her and that she has been caught and can mess with us. I love that fact that even thought me and her dad are apart we are learning to work out some of are differences.
    C.F

    Answer by C.F at 8:00 AM on May. 28, 2009

  • It sounds like he needs to get into counseling over some issues! And you should talk to your husband about this problem ASAP! about his son! Because this is not normal for boy to have bedwetting problems! And good luck!
    babyboomer1957

    Answer by babyboomer1957 at 8:52 AM on May. 28, 2009

  • 1. you need to get find out the root of the problem, 10yrs old and bedwetting is not right, telling lies just to lie is not right. I would suggest taking him to a counselor.

    2. If he has any kind of ADD or ADHD, then this could also cause the acting out.

    3. If you are married and knew he had a son then you need to care for the boy when you have time, you also need to let the dad know he needs to step up.

    4. Ground him for certain disrespectful actions, taking away what he likes the most and making him earn it back.

    5. Is he having problems in school?

    6. If there is a problem at the mother's house then maybe you and your husband should look into keeping him full time, take advantage of your local ymca for after school care.
    Tinamarie79

    Answer by Tinamarie79 at 7:16 AM on May. 29, 2009

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