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Do you think these things say a lot about the quality of mother this woman is?

She has two kids, the oldest is a girl and a boy 2 years younger. Growing up her son was really into sports. He lived for sports. He played every sport he could in school. In high school he was a star basketball player and played varsity football. His mom didn't attend a single game. Not an exaggeration, I wish it was. Even when he was little (7,8,9) she would just drop him off and never went to watch. She didn't have a full time job or younger kids, she just went home and watched TV during his games. Her husband (and father of her kids) left when her daughter was 9 and son was 7. He never spoke to his kids again. She got in a serious relationship with another man when her daughter was 12 and son was 10. This man was verbally abusive and an alcoholic. He treated her horrible. He was a terrible example for her kids and was in no way a father to them. Last summer he left her after 14 yrs together for a 17 yr old girl (he is 40)

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:05 PM on May. 28, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (63)
  • I agree with JPsMommy for sure. She probably didn't know any better and didn't understand the gravity of her actions (or non-actions). Although in this day and age I don't think that should be a viable excuse. It sounds like her kids are 26 and 24 now. So it wasn't that long ago. There are TONS of good places to find parenting advice. Books are easily accessed. Most communities have some sort of free classes that explain the importance of parenting and teach you how to do it. Even the school her kids went to offered help and advice.
    AnnaMac

    Answer by AnnaMac at 6:37 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • When her daughter was 14 she started dating a man who was 20. He was abusive, an alcoholic, and IMO a child molester. She got pregnant at 14. She dropped out of the 7th grade. A year later at 15 she got pregnant again by the same man (their baby was only 2 months old!). Her mother didn't teach her about birth control or even the concept of abstinence. She didn't teach her that she was worth more than this pathetic POS that fathered 3 of her children. Her mother never encouraged her to go back to school, so now at 26 she has a 7th grade education level and has NEVER had a job. Again at 17 she got pregnant by the same man. During this time period he also fathered 3 other kids from 2 other "women". By the time she was 21 she had 4 kids. Her mom never encouraged her to make anything of herself. The father of her first 3 kids left and was never to be seen again before the 3rd baby was born.


    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:06 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • She also didn't teach her son how important school was. Throughout elementary school he missed at least one day a week. His mom never told him he had to go, he just stayed home and did nothing.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:06 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • waaaaaaaaaaay too long. Not your business any way
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:06 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • OP
    How do you know this is not my business anon? Maybe she is my mom, maybe she is me, why are you so quick to jump to conclusions?

    If it is too long please don't read and don't bother putting your worthless answer.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:10 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • Put it in a journal. It's not a question.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:13 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • Anon :13 Sorry, but this is a question. She is asking for the opinions of others on this mom. If you don't like what you see than don't read it. Plain and simple

    OP- yea I think she sounds like a poor excuse for a mom. Just the never attending her sons games say alot about her and that is her smallest offense that you listed.
    aprilmommy123

    Answer by aprilmommy123 at 6:16 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • It sounds like a vicious cycle - she raised her kids the way she was probably raised and treated her kids likely the way she was treated - not on purpose or because she was lazy, but because she likely did not know any better and did not know how to break the cycle herself, much less recognize it for what it was. These cycles begin in infancy when our foundation for how relationships work are established and are not easily identified when you're in the middle of living them - sure, they can be seen by outsiders, but not from the inside. And her kids will continue in this cycle unless one or both of them gets counseling and help necessary to first identify it AS a problem and second, to find ways of becoming something other than a product of dysfunction. I wish all involved the best of luck.
    JPsMommy605

    Answer by JPsMommy605 at 6:19 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • i agree with aprilmommy123, she sounds like either a very troubled woman who never put her kids first or a someone who really couldn't care! It's sad when parents do these kinds of things and disregard their children!
    07lilmama1108

    Answer by 07lilmama1108 at 6:20 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • It sounds to me like the OP is looking to pick apart someone else's life because hers sucks and she has nothing better to do.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:35 PM on May. 28, 2009

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