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How do you deal with the Mom guilt?

My son is going to be 3 in a couple weeks and lately he has been throwing some good tantrums. I am good about dealing with the fit but I dont know how far to take it. For instance tonight I was reading him bedtime stories and all of a sudden he decides he wants Daddy. Now this can be an all night switcheroo thing with him so I say no he FLIPS out. So I tell him it is time for bed and since he wont behave I leave the room. He screams and cries for a while when he settles I go in and tell him that its not ok tuck him in and try to leave. He then begs me to stay and says he is sorry and I feel terrible!! I don't know if staying reinforces the bad behavior but leaving feels soo mean...

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:29 PM on May. 28, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (4)
  • You have to be consistent and firm. No, you are not being mean. You are confirming that that behavior is not acceptable and he will not get what he wants just because he demanded it. Hold firm, kiss him good night, and leave. He will catch on very quickly that good behavior makes for a better bed time.

    Answer by MommyId at 8:45 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • stay firm.. when my ds acts up before bedtime i dont go back in until after he is asleep. he ahd his chance to say good night and be good and he didnt so hes punished by ahving to stay in his room while we have stories....

    jsut stay firm...stick to your guns

    Answer by 2cuteboysrmine at 9:24 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • you shower your child with praise, hugs, kisses, and lots of quality time when he's being good he's not going to remember you left during a tantrum the night before...Kids have a very short memory span and they instinctively remember the good at a young age. My son is very stubborn and goes to bed most nights crying because he didn't get his way, but by the next morning I'm his best friend again. Just stay firm and remember he's crying to get his way, not because he doubts your love for him.

    Answer by ba13ygrl1987 at 11:05 PM on May. 28, 2009

  • When he apologized it made it ok for you to stay.

    Answer by rkoloms at 11:35 AM on May. 29, 2009

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