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How do you politely ask for help from family?

My FIL is living with DH and I and our two kids. We also have a baby due in a few weeks. FIL said he'd only need a few months to find a place, but he hasn't even looked. He's being very hard headed about taking his medicine, and went back to the hospital last night because he thought he was having a stroke. So since we are going to have our hands full very soon with our third child, and I'll be recovering from a c-section, it stands to reason that we are feeling overwhelmed. SIL has plenty of room for him, and we need the help now. I would love to hear some polite ways to ask her for some help at this time.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:51 AM on May. 29, 2009 in Just for Fun

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • Since this is your DH's sister HE has to ask for help. And he has to tell SIL just what you said "Look dad has been with us for X months. The baby is about to arrive and we will have our plates full can FIL move in with you for a while."

    or straight to FIL... same message, but put it on him to tt SIL about moving in.

    Either way...things won't change if he keeps quiet,
    Niki_sd

    Answer by Niki_sd at 2:03 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • "i hate to ask this, but we really need help, i dont know how we are going to be able to do this. does anyone have any ideas? its so hard to ask this, but please help us."
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:54 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • ..... just talk to them like you just wrote it out here....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:55 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • I would just ask her over or call her and have your husband there to back you up. Ask her if your FIL can stay with her for a few weeks while you recuperate and she helps him look for a place because you can no longer do that for him. Next thing you know she will have to be helping him and you will be enjoying your new baby.
    Gigi1969

    Answer by Gigi1969 at 12:57 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • The hard thing is actually talking to her. She is pretty selfish when it comes to things that don't benefit her....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:05 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • Think this should be somthing you and your husband do together, Go to her and exsplain just as you have how things are gona be getting more hecktic in your house the next few weeks and that she perhaps would have more time helping your FIL looking for a place.
    Shaqbe4u

    Answer by Shaqbe4u at 1:12 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • If she has that type of personality then I say you step it up a notch when it comes to NOT taking no for an answer. I'm serious, I am going through this with a selfish bossy SIL that lives with my mom and she tries to dictate and change things that my mom has been doing in her home for 55 years! My mom is set in her ways and it is her house. It is your home and the most important thing is like I said before, your recuperation and you new baby. If SIL has the room then your husband should point that out to her. If it gets down to it and you can swing it, offer to help her with groceries for him.
    Gigi1969

    Answer by Gigi1969 at 1:18 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • I'm also kinda wondering if DH will just keep his mouth shut so he won't cause "drama" within his family. That does suck, but it also sucks that we are the ones that everyone in his family turns to and expects to do everything.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:21 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • I hope you get this situation resolved soon.
    zboys

    Answer by zboys at 1:38 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • It is time for you and dear FIL to have a "heart to heart".He is a grown man and should not living with his kids and expecting them to support him, period. Your husband needs to tell his father he needs to find another place to live. Your husband has a family of his own and needs to think of them first.
    ronjwake

    Answer by ronjwake at 1:48 AM on May. 29, 2009

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