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What does he mean by "I've got him own idea"?

I gave him an ultimatum to either commit or to not call me anymore. He didn't call today but I did call his friend to see if he was ok because he tried to hurt himself a few days ago. He was ok, he was watching TV. It hurt so I wrote him a goodbye msg...stupid, I know.

He said: You said don't call until you are ready...Dont make a big deal out of it. Love you.

I told him: I gave you that ultimatum last night &I never said I was going to wait for you to make your decision or until you were ready, I told you that I was tired of waiting & that if you wanted to commit to us, then you would call & if you didn't want to commit to us, then to never call me again & you didn't call so goodbye. If you really wanted this, you wouldn't have to think about it & you would've called. End of subject. Love Always.

He said: Hmmm. Thats not how I heard it. I'm not thinking about it anyway. I've got my own idea. Love you and goodnight.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:13 AM on May. 29, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Well, he is still saying I Love You and being nice so, I think he wants to be with you but not they way you want it. "his idea" Tell him you would love to know what that is.

    If you didnt want it to end honey they I wouldnt have given him an ultimatum. Ultimatums dont tend to work the way you want them to with those air headed men.

    I would give him a few days, tell him you were alittle durastic because you were hurt and that if it is possible you want to work it out, or at least know what your guy's plans are for the future, if you even have any.

    Answer by HunnysFarAway at 1:18 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • Don't ever give a ultimatum unless you are willing to take either answer.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:20 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • Kinda hard to decipher since it's kind of a mixed message. "That's not how I heard it" means, 1. His friend did not tell him a correct interpretation of what you said 2, He is using the fact that he didn't talk to you directly as a way of saying his friend got the facts mixed up 3. He's flat out lying and doesn't want to hurt you but doesn't want to commit.either. A man doesn't want to be chased. Back off from him. If he misses you and if the love is good, HE will come to YOU. If he doesn't, don't waste any more of your time.

    Answer by Aprilmorgans at 1:25 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • let him go. you should never have to give a man that truly loves you and wants to be with you an ultimatum in the first place cause there would be no question about it he would be with you and never would of risked losing you if he truly wanted to be committed to you. i never fully understood that until i met my husband. he always wanted to be with me and i never had to question it and truly that is how it is. it's not just in movies but in true life if a man really can see himself with you they are with you every minute and never leave you guessing how they feel. so once again let him go and find that man that can truly appreciate what he has when he has you!

    Answer by melody77 at 1:26 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • I feel like crap for calling or writing because I was ok with the idea of him being done.

    I only called because he tried to kill himself and I wanted to make sure that he was ok and that the reason for him not calling wasn't because he was dead or something...Sometimes I wish that my internet and phone would just shut off for awhile and stop working. I just want him to be straight with me and I think that is why I keep bringing it up. I just want to know now! It's been two years and I am tired of waiting for him to actually be a part of our lives.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:27 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • It should not be that hard of a decision on whether he wants to be with you or not. If he has to have time to think about it, then I would say he really does not want to commit. He is just not man enough to say it.

    Answer by Magpie75 at 3:38 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • After two yrs, he should know what he wants. If he still needs to "think" about it, it sounds like he knows what he wants, which is not to be with you, but he doesn't want to let you go either. He might be one of those people who can't stand to be alone, they've always got to be in a relationship. So, he strings you along, so he has someone, while waiting for someone he really wants to be with. I know that probably hurts you, and I am sorry, but I just don't think that after 2 yrs, you should still be waiting for him to decide. I think your ultimatum was a good one, and you should stick by it. Let him go, and find a man who can appreciate and love you, and who truly wants to be with you. That's what you deserve, not this.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 6:19 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • If it's so easy for you to walk away then you shouldn't be with him anyway.

    Answer by Chrissy629 at 6:31 AM on May. 29, 2009

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