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Should I let my mother-in-law keep my 2 year old?!

Ok... I know this sounds awful, but hear me out. My mother-in-law wants to keep my 2 year old daughter for a whole week this summer. I have several problems (big ones!) with this. 1. She lives 6-7 hours away in a different state 2. I took my daughter there in March for her 2nd b-day and my MIL paid little to no attn to her, and at one pt let me wander into the street! I don't trust her and I don't want my child there. My husband says it's bc I don't like her and I'm being vindictive (I'm not!) My child's safety is more important than her feelings. But am I being over protective? He wants her to spend time with her only grandchild. He trusts her but I don't. I need some advice!! Thanks!

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Asked by Bella0308 at 9:11 AM on May. 29, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 2 (3 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I would let her spend the night, but only if you stay too. I would not trust her with your DD alone. I don't care what you husband wants. It only takes one time for you daughter to run into the street and get hit by a car. If grandma cannot keep a close eye on her, then she has no business watching her alone.

    Maybe only stay like 3 days or so instead of a whole week.

    Answer by 2wndrfl_btrflys at 9:16 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • I think that one time you are basing your worries on is misjudged. For one sometimes people are not going to pay their full attention always on one person, two mistakes do happen. Im sure even you have made some and if you haven't you will. I think perhaps your husband may be right. That on a sub-level you don't want your daughter to go to your MIL because you don't like her, but your cracking up to be because you don't trust her. I say for the sake of your marriage and some peace with your MIL. Let her. The 1 week is to long. then just do it for the weekend. Compromise.

    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 9:18 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • I agree with 2wndrfl, make it like a family vacation. With the reasons you gave, I wouldn't trust her either. And I wouldn't want to let my kids go out of state without me, regardless of who they were staying with, and I do trust my family. I think it's natural for him to feel that you are saying no b/c you don't like her, everyone wants to think their parents are great, but you are right to say no.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 9:18 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • Tell her no. If she wants to spend time with her you go to and do like a 4 day weekend where you stay in the back ground and let G ma take charge but you will be there to keep things on the level. Take the days for your self for like 3-4 hours and go shopping or to the beach and let them have some alone time. Tell G ma that ur daughter is too young to be away from u that long and you dont think your daughter would enjoy herself. That way you don't look like a bad guy. Good luck


    Answer by lostshel at 9:18 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • I can't trust my MIL w/my daughter either, and my girl is 7! (But she lives with sight of our house, so she can visit any time she likes). My husband feels the same, but on RARE occasion he wants to battle about it. I simply ask him if he trusts his mom to borrow his truck (or whatever prized possession) for a week, and the answer is ALWAYS no! So why would I let her take OUR DAUGHTER? He gets it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:38 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • the fact she wodnered into the street. i would say im sorry but i cant trust that, invite her to visit the baby for a week

    Answer by moki1984 at 9:44 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • My DD is almost 3 and by the 2nd night away she gets terrible home sickness and wants to come home. At this age I don't think they are ready to be away from mom and dad for a whole week. As for the wandering in the street thing, you were there she probably wasn't watching her as fully as she would have if she was alone with the child. I would offer trying a weekend first and see how that goes.

    Answer by MammaMcC at 10:37 AM on May. 29, 2009

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