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Should I be seeking counseling?

I am so busy (this time of year especially) with kids, work, and the house that the last thing I think about is sex. My hubby on the other hand is always in the mood. Unfortunately, he doesn't know how to get me in the mood. He thinks by him just showing up to bed, that should turn me on. Far from it. I have so many things on my mind that when I lay down, I truly want to go to sleep. I don't want to be like this but sex feels like work for me. I just don't need another thing on my plate. Should I be seeking counseling?

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on May. 29, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • I think u should try to get in the mood first, by some romance- like make a date and go out to dinner, or watch a romantic movie- get a sitter- if that doesnt work talk to ur GYN- Maybe he will run tests on ur hormones/ maybe he sould suggest a med, or something.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:00 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • I think you should talk to your husband. Let him know that you have alot going on, and you are just too tired. Is there a way husband can help you out with some of the things you do with the kids/house at night? Or what about telling him things he could do to help get you in the mood--- maybe take over the kids bedtime so you can have a nice soak in the tub to unwind, or him giving you a foot rub or back massage? Would he be happy with just cuddling some nights?

    Answer by MizLee at 11:01 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • what would a counseler do honey? there is not anything wrong with you, all moms feel like you do. Too much to do, too little support, and for us its things like helping us with the kids and house that bring intimacy and intamacy leads to feeling sexual for women alot of times.You need to be honest and tell hubby what you need from him emotionally and sexually besides his showing you the bed like thats such a freakin turn on lol. men are idiots sometimes.

    Answer by Bearsjen at 11:01 AM on May. 29, 2009

  • I would first think about any meds you might be taking tha can affect you. My BC was like that.
    Then I would work on having some relaxing me time before bed. Meditate, read, breathe, whatever helps you. I do this because it quiets my mind and helps me step out of the mom role or work role etc. It will also help you sleep, you won't have nightmares about forgetting some errand, bill, or phone call. Third I would talk to DH about needing more time to be in the mood. Seduction can be an all day thing, smoldering looks, secret touches when the kids aren't in the room, etc.

    Answer by Lesli at 12:04 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • no... you should tell your husband what the problem is and invite him to try a little harder to get you excited about sex

    Answer by figaro8895 at 2:19 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • I agree, there's a lot to do to hold down the household and life. Then many other responsibilities... Relaxing and his help to get you in the mood are necessity, but so is sleep. Discuss what works and maybe even a sched of when you and when you have sex would be known that way he wouldn't feel slighted and neither would you.

    Answer by kgspecial55 at 12:21 PM on May. 30, 2009

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