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My 2.5 y/o son often won't make eye contact with me. Is this normal?

He talks & plays fine. He loves "things" tho, ever since he was born (he'd often stare at the fans & walls instead of me). He's super into cars now & takes them to bed & everywhere. He can be fairly "studious" looking at books. He loves long car rides. He is very affectionate with us & has the typical toddler rowdies & fits. It just seems like he rarely looks me in the eye, even if I get down close & ask him to look @ my eyes, he usually looks way to the side. Sometimes if we're laughing about something or he's making a request he will. We have an attachment parenting style, so I just don't understand this.

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Asked by phroggtrapp at 1:33 PM on May. 29, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (5)
  • Its hard to tell. I would get him checked out - my son was totally obsessed with fans and walls -still is sometimes at 18 months -actually, my son sounds like yours - I know he does look me in the eye right now, did he when he was younger? Is this more recent changed behavior?

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 2:03 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • my son was like that...hes been diagnosed adhd/bipolar now though... he could sit on the floor and we'd call his name and he wouldnt stop what he ws doing to even look at us.

    Answer by doodlemoore812 at 2:19 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • Maxsmom - He looked @ me more during the ages when he was studying me to learn the names of things, etc. It seems to have been gradual. Not sure if it's just his personality& his interests or part of him asserting his independence or if somehow Ive hurt his confidence or what. He's very social & will jump right into interacting w/ other kids. I think he talks well & had a good vocab, tho it's hard to get him to answer questions & doesnt ask many either.On the other hand, he studies things carefully, saying "see how works.""

    Answer by phroggtrapp at 2:22 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • You know, you could always have him evaluated. I think that from how you posted the question, it sounds like you have a diagnosis you are scared to hear but common with lack of eye contact - and I can honestly tell you that I felt from the time max was born he was "different" so I look for signs regularly but it really sounds like if there is anything at all, it would be a very mild form but early detection is key also I hear.

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 3:03 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • For your piece of mind, talk to your doctor and have him evaluated. If he interacts with other kids, this is a good sign. As I suspect you're aware, lack of eye contact (or making less and less eye contact) can be a sign of autism as can too obsessive a focus on single types of toys or topics. Hopefully nothing is wrong but he may sit on the edge of the autism spectrum. If that's the case, the sooner he can get help, the better.. Good luck!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:16 PM on May. 29, 2009

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