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How to my son use to the new baby?

Im 30 wks. And my son is VERY jealous when I hold my friend's baby. How can I get him use to the fact his little world is about to change? Hubby bought him a Mcqueen race car bed and did his room all in cars to make him feel like a big boy. But he is use to mommy having 100% att. on him. Would you say that he is to spoiled? MIL says I pay to much att. to him and thats why he is a brat when I hold another baby.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:09 PM on May. 29, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (6)
  • I also have a three year old- but he doesn't care about me holding other babies- he HAS been having BAd behavior at preschool though- and his teacher explained that it will just get worse before it gets better. So you kind of have to expect it. One thing I am doing with Ayden when I have another baby with me is I ask him to help me. He LOVES to help in all things, so I ask him to hold the baby (I help of course) and I ask him to entertain the baby while I change diapers, ect. I also told him this is HIS baby. He tries to read to the baby and he is always sharing his favorite foods and drinks with my belly now :) Good Luck! Figure out something he loves to do and use that to your advantage :)
    jessicasea

    Answer by jessicasea at 8:13 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • my daughter is 3 and i just had my little boy. so this is what i did, there is a book called i'm a big sister (theres the brother version same book only changes sis to bro) we read that while i was preg and it made her understand babies a little more. its really simple and just says things like babies cry, babies can't talk, walk etc...but i'm a big girl and i can....and it also tells them they used to be babies too. she "helps" take care of her baby brother by bringing me stuff or "holding" him. she sings him lullabies when he cries if i'm making a bottle or can't get there immediately. when my mom brought her to the hospital i had her bring some mini cupcakes too and i had a 0 candle and a small gift for my daughter and we had a little bday party for nathan. and she loved that. tell him its his baby brother/sister and he gets to be the big brother who teaches his sibling all kinds of things like how to make funny faces, cont
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 8:17 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • I know this sounds crazy. But when my niece was over a lot when I was pregnant with my son we used to get out a baby doll and give the doll attention around her so she could get used to some one else sharing the attention. The only problem we had when he was born is that she thought he was a baby doll and wanted to carry him around. She was a year and a month old when he was born. =) I know it sounds silly, but it might work. Or you could use a teddy bear to make it a little more manly. lol!
    Krystal.Ingalls

    Answer by Krystal.Ingalls at 8:19 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • how to talk, etc...and all that has worked for my daughter. nathans only 8 days old but we've only had one night where for about 15 mins she fussed and said she wanted to be a baby, which is much better than i expected from her. as far as if he is spoiled, nope i don't think so i think just b/c they get lots of attention doesn't make a kid spoiled it makes them secure in the fact that you love them. when baby comes make sure that you tell the baby he has to wait too (you'll tell big bro he has to wait alot so tell the baby when he starts whimpering oh you gotta wait b/c i'm playing w/so and so) and put off going over immediately for a min or two that way the older one sees that he's still special.
    just talk it up alot, start now b/c you're close enough where you can start to talk about it and he'll get it. just tell him all the fun parts of being a big bro but make sure he knows the reality in that baby can't play and baby cr
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 8:20 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • Also, don't forget to let your son help with baby! Make it an exiting thing. Let him bring out a diaper, pick out baby's clothes, if he's old enough, let him hold the baby while you help. Let him pick out toys and stuff for the baby.

    Once baby is born, you need to make 1-on-1 time a priority for him. And I mean, like almost every day do something just with you and him, even if it's only for 30 minutes.
    Arkaidy

    Answer by Arkaidy at 10:02 PM on May. 29, 2009

  • I have always let my older children play with the baby from day one. My SM thought I was crazy with my first bc he was only 14 months himself, but after 6 she's decided my way seems to work out great. As long as the older isn't hurting the baby intentionally, they can do pretty much whatever they want to include the baby in their world. We encourage them to try to carry the baby (we help), show the baby your toys (we have a great pic of 27mo son playing with trucks beside newbie brother that I am holding), take baby into the living room tent you made (I stay really close by), and so on. We also let olders help with babies - diapers, wipes, clothes, burp clothes, blankets, folding cloth dipes and other laundry - but letting them take them into their world has been the best thing to stop jealousy. It's unheard of in our home to use the words "No, the baby is asleep" or "You can't ___ bc of the new baby". That breeds jealousy!
    GrowingMama

    Answer by GrowingMama at 1:23 AM on May. 30, 2009

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