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I need a shoulder to cry on ..

Well, I was silly and cleaned out my comp and got rid of passwords on my email accounts, so I go to use SO"s laptop and google in hotmail, well his history popped up on this dating site, so I go and take a look, and he has a profile! Created May 11th, and it says he's a single and looking father of one ..WTF?!?! I look at his messages and he's hitting on all these women and saying what a bad relationship I was, and how things didn't work out. Hmm last time I checked before he went out with his brother tonight, he kissed me and said he loved me. I look at the last time he was on and it was yesterday!! He's cheated on me 3 times and this has taken the cake, I've tried to trust him and let him in again and I have until now .. ladies I know I should've left a long time ago, but I just need to feel better about something right now .. any advice and kind words? I can't stop shaking and crying .. I feel so .. lost ...

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DesignerMom0801

Asked by DesignerMom0801 at 1:22 AM on May. 30, 2009 in Relationships

Level 4 (42 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • Wow. Girl you are cute as a button I don't know what his problem is. I think you know what you need to do, get rid of his butt! He sounds like a real ass and don't deserve ya.
    ronjwake

    Answer by ronjwake at 1:29 AM on May. 30, 2009

  • I'm sorry to hear he's doing this to you!!! I would be absolutely furious! I can't imagine how you feel and I guess it's time to leave if he won't tell you whats going on. Me personally, if my husband cheats (and he knows this) I would take our dd and run. If he doesn't give me the respect to tell me whats wrong, he doesn't care about our family including our dd. I really hope things go better for you!!! Is there somewhere else you can stay??? I would ask him about it and see what he says even tho you already know, that might help... and if he gets upset, leave. I don't know what else to say besides good luck!
    07lilmama1108

    Answer by 07lilmama1108 at 1:29 AM on May. 30, 2009

  • Aw honey. I'm so sorry to hear of your problems. You know you are worth more then that. You know you deserve better. He obviously cant love you the way you need to be loved. You must really love him. It takes a strong woman to try to work it out with someone that many times. I'm sure he cant even imagine what he'll be loseing. He'll miss you once your gone for good. Keep your head up girly. Get past this. I know you can. It will take time ...a lot of it. But you'll find someone who will treat you better.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:29 AM on May. 30, 2009

  • Well perfect example my last 2 children's father was with me for almost 3yr. when we moved back to my hometown things got rough. i was working and pregnant while he was home on the chat line and internet cheating and boy look at this.. he left me one night saying he was going outside to smoke and never came back. Now I had to have sugery while pregnant with my little girl. This fool had the NERVE to have Jerry Springer show call my hospital room that he couldnt show up in to support me during sugery in. I got home called him over cause he was stayin with his new girl. but baby let me tell you when he came over my house that next day I got home from the hospital. I KICKED HIS NATURAL A** and let me tell you i bet he felt every pain that i went through and was going through. he passed out 3 times in the middle of the street tryin to get away. i know violence is not the answer but sometime you cant let people treat you any way!!!
    laydlexius

    Answer by laydlexius at 1:33 AM on May. 30, 2009

  • Yep time to move on! I'm sorry this happened to you:( And I know this is a cliche', but everything happens for a reason:)
    Also, I wouldn't even tell him I knew about it until I had enough money to leave him. So save some money and come up with a plan then tell him you know everything.
    I wish you the best!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:34 AM on May. 30, 2009

  • I'm sorry to hear this and I really hope things get better. I agree with outstandingLove you are worth more than how is he is treating you. Just take this as a learning experience. Get busy in other aspects of your life to take your mind of the pain and hurt. It will surely get better...sometimes you have to hit rock bottom before you can reach the top.....some people can't help it and aren't meant to be in monogamous relationships....
    SCrockett

    Answer by SCrockett at 1:35 AM on May. 30, 2009

  • "Also, I wouldn't even tell him I knew about it until I had enough money to leave him. So save some money and come up with a plan then tell him you know everything.
    I wish you the best! "

    I agree with this. Make sure you have a plan. That way you cant back out of it.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 1:39 AM on May. 30, 2009

  • I am sorry for what happens . I checked you profile and you have a beatiful dougther and you are just gorgeous!!!. You just have to be strong, and move on and leave that man, I know is easy for me to say it, ( I am not in your shoes), but find somewhere the support of friends and family, Do it for yourself and for your baby!!!!!, You deserve the best,
    Good luck!!!, and please talk with family and close friends,
    sami7jami8

    Answer by sami7jami8 at 1:41 AM on May. 30, 2009

  • I would talk to him about this and show him the site. This happened to me actually. I googled my husband's name for fun one night and a dating service site popped up. So I looked and sure enough there was a profile and it was listed as single and looking. And I checked to see if it had been updated and sure enough, like a week before it had been updated. So when he hit the door that night I confronted him. It was his profile but from before we got together, and he hadn't actually been on the site, but his birthday had been the week before and it automatically updated it for him. So my advice would be to confront him and if he says it is his site and he is actually looking then leave. It could even be an identity theft situation too.
    cjbj08

    Answer by cjbj08 at 1:44 AM on May. 30, 2009

  • How awful for you. I am so sorry I wish I could help you in some way. You do need to get away from him.
    calliesmommie

    Answer by calliesmommie at 1:45 AM on May. 30, 2009

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