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should a 23 year old be livening at home with his girl friend and 15 month old and 1 on the way hes has no job and no where to go please tell me what you think.

i am disabled and the girlfriend is very lazy. its makeing me sicker i would throw them both out but i love the baby they use her to get their way.

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audrablu

Asked by audrablu at 3:55 PM on May. 30, 2009 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (18)
  • Well you've got 2 choices, either let them be lazy and worthless, or you can put your foot down and DEMAND that they find a job or live elsewhere
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 3:57 PM on May. 30, 2009

  • You need to draw a line in the sand. Either they work and contribute to the household, or they leave in 60 days.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:29 PM on May. 30, 2009

  • They will never grow up as long as you let them live at home!!! My brother is 27 and still living at home, because Mom & Dad won't let him grow up. Your doing a lot more damage than good!!! Kick them out!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:54 PM on May. 30, 2009

  • I think that your son(from what you wrote) needs a dose of reality.If he had to live alone with his GF and children, could they make it?. You need to ask him and her these questions. And then tell them very nicely( a lot of people can't hear very well when they argue or yell) what you expect from them. Don't ask, tell them.Sure you love your grandchild, but, is this the kind of environment that you want him/her to grow up in.I know things are hard with a lot of people so if its ok for them to stay with you, then set boundaries and rules.They need it. If you don't do it now, things can get really ugly. they need to know that life isn't easy as they have it.
    Kat122

    Answer by Kat122 at 5:17 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • umm no mam no no! both of them would be getting a job and give them 7-8months to get out. tell them to save up for a small apartment maybe a 2 bedroom decent maybe even tell them if they both find a job and save up you will help them out with first months rent? ANd thats IT! not pay full maybe give them 300$ or something.. but no mam they need to start living their own life! i cant blve they dont have jobs omg. who pays for the babies diapers?
    NewLady1

    Answer by NewLady1 at 1:31 PM on May. 31, 2009

  • OH! and i forgot tell them THEY WILL be out in 7-8 months its your place and theyneed to be out then if not you are kicking them out. its not an option! they need to be more responsible with 2kids . thats redicioulous maybe u can even watch the kids one day if u are able to. they need some boundaries
    NewLady1

    Answer by NewLady1 at 1:33 PM on May. 31, 2009

  • Tell them to sign up for Section 8 and get their own place that goes by their income. No way in hell would I let them mooch off of me. My son moved back home with his gf and 2 kids but he worked. She was a bum and made a mess and wouldn't pick up after herself or the kids. I went and rented them a place just to get them out! She finally went home to mommy and mooched off her for years and my son moved back to Ky near his dad. That is just too much for any person. They are adults and need to live on their own.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:34 AM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • If they are not contributing to the household then they need to be out...if neither one have a job, then they need not to be having more babies that they can't provide for. My husband, myself and our 2 year old daughter share a home with my parents....we both work and we also SPLIT the bills down the middle...we help pay for food, we share the housework/yardwork etc....As a parent i understand you want to help your children,but he is grown and not being a MAN and staking responsibility for the family that he is continually adding to...tell him to get a job or GET OUT..there is NO EXCUSE why at least one of them in not working....DO NOT let them use your grandchild as a bargaining chip...tell them you love your grandbaby, but you won't let them walk all over you...either they work and contribute or they have to leave...plain and simple...good luck!
    ThinkPink23

    Answer by ThinkPink23 at 1:07 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • I would not allow that to happen in my home.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 4:01 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • I'm almost 24 and I couldn't fathom the thought of moving back in with my parents with my husband and son. They need to move out and rough it on their own, after all how in the world are they going to learn the value of money and what it takes to live and take care of two children. If they are capable of making those babies then they are capable of finding a job and supporting those children. Set your foot down now before it gets to out of control. Your house, your rules!!
    usmc0351wife

    Answer by usmc0351wife at 7:30 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

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