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Has nyone ever gotten mad because you decided to get a tattoo or a pierceing?

I told my husband what I was going to do before I went and that I wanted it for a long time. I am now thirty and I wanted a tattoo of my kids first letter of their name and to get several pirecings. Im not wanting to change who I am. I feel like this will make me more of who I am. I have honored my husbands wishes for at least 10 years and ever since I turned 30 I know my life is somewhat not how I wanted it to turn out to be. I want to do this for me and myself alone. My husband thinks I done this for someone eles and is very mad that I would go ahead with what I wanted. He said that I did not repect his wishes about not having it done and he calls a tattoo trashy. He now calls me that name. I can understand that he is mad but it is my body and I am happy about my dection and my kids like it. What do you think about all of this? What would you do?

 
Momof3Squirts

Asked by Momof3Squirts at 9:41 AM on May. 31, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (17)
  • I would sit down and have a serious discussion with him. Ask that he refrain from insulting you, which there is absolutely NO excuse for, and explain exactly why you would like to do this. It is YOUR body, and he has NO right to treat you like that.

    Tattoos and piercings on women are NOT trashy Correction: They are only as trashy as the woman who gets them. And, make sure you shop around and ask for examples of work done, to ensure that you get GOOD work. Check the places for how clean they are, and make sure that they ahve an autoclave ON SITE! There is a big difference between a bunch of nice tattoos and well done piercings, and a bunch of crappy tattoos and badly done piercings.
    _Jynxx_

    Answer by _Jynxx_ at 10:53 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • It's your body and if you've wanted to do it for years then do it.
    ajguinn

    Answer by ajguinn at 9:43 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • i got a tattoo of angel wings while my husband was in school for the airforce. he actually got mad at me for getting it. i told him get over because its my body and my choice. lol. now we are trying to figure out what my 3rd tattoo is going to be.
    SThompson21

    Answer by SThompson21 at 9:47 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • That's awesome! Glad to see that you did something to make yourself happy. Since when does marriage = ownership? He married you...he doesn't own you. JMO though. I come from a family where I'm the only one without a tattoo yet...lol...I'm just too indecisive about what I want.
    KaylasMiracle

    Answer by KaylasMiracle at 9:48 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • Ya, it's your body and your hubby needs to chill on the name calling, he's being more disrespectful to you then he thinks you were to your body. If you want to get 30 pirecings and 40 tattoos then thats your choice. Your then one that has to live with that on your body for life. Tattoos are'nt trashy i have 18 tattoos and 15 pirecings and im far from trashy nor do they look trashy. You are your own person so live your life the way you want, don't let anyone stand in your way....GIRL POWER......
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 9:54 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • I'm the odd ball out... if he finds it trashy looking then you shouldn't have done it because you lost your appeal to him. When he's not wanting to touch you because you don't look good to him anymore, I'll still stand behind my statement. Until both of the halves of the couple agree with it, it shouldn't be done. I agree with him, it looks trashy, especially on a woman but not to say it means the person is trash or should be put down for it but if my hubby got one I'd be repulsed by him because he knows how I feel about them and if he wants to appeal to me, he'll never get one but lucky for me, he feels the same way about it and doesn't like the way they make a person look. Not to mention that the outside world does treat you different.. it's always been associated with thugs but it's not nearly as bad as it used to be in perception.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 9:58 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • thanks for everyones thoughts...i feel like i have a bond now with my kids that i didnt have before. thats kinda weird me saying that but getting it done all i was thinking about was how happy i was and about my boys.
    Momof3Squirts

    Answer by Momof3Squirts at 10:31 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • It might ruine your marriage..Because if I really wanted a tattoo or piercing..And my DH started calling me bad na,mes cause I went and did it..I would seriously think of leaving him...I do not want to be abused the rest of my life for what I wanted to do.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 10:42 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • Also:

    Your husband does not own you. He should support you no matter what choices you make, as long as they are within reason.. And body modifications, especially if it is something you have thought about for a long time, are completely within reason. I would leave DF in a heartbeat if he every started saying I have to respect HIS wishes, but he is calling me and my desires trashy (which would imply that I have to respect his wishes, but he doesn't have to respect mine).

    Again, I'd suggest sitting down and having a heart to heart with him.

    Tattoos, piercings, and other forms of body modification change your appearance, to a certain extent. They do NOT change who YOU are. You would still be the woman that he fell in love with, ink and metal and all.

    "I know my life is somewhat not how I wanted it to turn out to be"

    Honey, I would seriously think about what you mean by that. And you deserve to do something for you!
    _Jynxx_

    Answer by _Jynxx_ at 10:57 AM on May. 31, 2009

  • what i ment by that was tha i have conformed to his wishes for so long and something changed inside of me when i turned 30. i started thinking about what have i completed in my life and i didnt have much to say about it. i love my husband and want too make him happy so i have abided by his wishes for so long.
    Momof3Squirts

    Answer by Momof3Squirts at 11:10 AM on May. 31, 2009

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