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Anyone else out there don't believe in their children spending the night away from home?

I have 2 children ages 2 and 4. I just don't believe in sleepovers or I don't believe in my children sleeping away from home. my Mother understands because she was the same way with me and my sisters. My in-laws on the other hand are taking it very personal. They feel I'm stealing there grandparent experience away. My husband supports my decision, but he feels guilty because his parents are constantly complaining about it. This is one of those things that's nonnegotiable!

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:59 PM on Jun. 1, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (28)
  • I have no problem with my kids spending the night at my parents or sisters house, however they do not spend the night at friend's houses. I feel comfortable enough with my family and know what goes on in their house, so that's ok. My son (7 years old) has asked repeatedly to spend the night at his best friends house...who happens to be our neighbor, but I never have or never will allow that.

    Answer by mauspond at 4:03 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • i sometimes wish my dd would stay the night with my mom but i don't want her staying with the inlaws (she's almost 3) but my mom lives next door to me so that's why i wouldn't mind it so much & i could use the extra sleep

    Answer by josiesmommy00 at 4:04 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • Can't say that I believe in that but I do have fears. I would let my dd go stay with grandparents no problem. My dd is on a trip with my mom right now and I think it is great. Slumber parties seem ok to me, but I worry alot about sexual abuse so I am afraid of her staying at friends houses. You never really know anyone and predators look so normal and are usually outgoing. I dread the day she wants to stay at a friends alot...even though I would always know the fam. it would still scare me. But I want her to have the experience of camp so I would let her practice sleeping over at freinds.

    Answer by ria7 at 4:11 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • i have no problem with my daughter staying at grandma and grandpas or my sisters, or my brothers..but at her friends' house, no..

    Answer by alexis_06 at 4:16 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • I am not like son stayed with my parents whenever he wanted. He spent the night with friends starting at age 5. He is 13 and still stays at all his friends houses and they stay with us. I have no problem with it. He has stayed at an aunts house too.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 4:17 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • Thats up to you and your fam, not everyone else. However you likely feel that way because that was the way you were raised.

    I, on the other hand, don't believe in not allowing my kids to sleep over others' homes. Specifically grandparents. My kids go to my dads every summer and stay about 2 weeks. They love it. Just like adults, kids get tired of being indoors all the time.

    I have felt the way you do before. Especially when they were babies. My daughter had sleep apnea and was on a monitor and my SIL wanted to have her for a night so bad (she always wanted a girl and had 3 boys)..I said no 100 times and then finally gave it. It wasn't bad at all. I needed the break and she kept me updated on how she was doing. But since then, I've learned to let them breathe a little :-)

    Sounds like a symptom of overparenting.

    Answer by babycakes254 at 4:35 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • Speaking on behalfs of the Grandmas everywhere,we love our grandkids,when,you start a relationship with grandparents at a young age it goes a long way,my 15 year old grandson won't leave my side,I have 6 grands,I love and treat each one of them better than my kids,lol.We don't let our children spend the night out either,thats why we do movie night,game night,at Grandma house.

    Answer by lady-t3984 at 4:35 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • My kids don't spend the night anywhere either. I don't think that Grandparents need to have their grandkids spend the night in order to spend time w/ them and have a close relationship w/ them. They just need to make an effort.

    For example, we live 4hrs. from family. My kids are really close w/ my mom because she calls them a couple of times a month, and comes out to visit every 2-3 months and stays w/ us. They have medium closeness w/ my Dad and Step-mom because they call a couple of times a month, and come to visit twice a year. They aren't really that close w/ my Inlaws because they NEVER call us and they only come to visit once a year or less, even though they have been invited to come whenever they would like.

    So anyway, all of that to say that no my kids don't stay overnight anywhere, friends or family, at least not at this point. Maybe when they are preteen/teenagers.

    Answer by sarahmae3 at 4:48 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • I think you're being overprotective. I see no reason why my kids can't spend the night with people I trust. That means close friends and family. I like having the break for one thing.

    Answer by circle_of_life at 5:07 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

  • I think it's healthy for kids to have time with family (like grandparents or aunt's/uncles) away from Mommy and Daddy. My kids have been left alone with grandparents overnight a few times before. And they are 2 and 4. Of course we are 13 hours and 21 hours away from them so any time they can get with them is great.

    My 4 year old actually had her first real sleepover at our neighbors house right before we moved. They had a blast and I wasn't worried because she was RIGHT next door.

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 5:08 PM on Jun. 1, 2009

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