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I was always the one on here that said "oh who cares if your SO looks at porn.. i do it too.." well now.....

im not against it, and i dont mind if my DH looks at it sometimes at all. ill do it with him. but now, its getting serious, its an every day thing.. sometimes twice a day. its not like he isnt getting anything from me, he is, i honestly think he is very much addicted to it. its getting out of control. honestly i could care less if people watch porn i do it myself too, but its getting to be TOO much!! 1-2 times a day.
i tell him i dont like when he does it so often and i think he has a problem with it, but he still does it. should i just let it go that he does it so often. or tell him another way that i really think he has a problem with doing it SOOO often??

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:20 AM on Jun. 2, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (6)
  • I'd just tell him again how you feel. Ask him why he thinks he DOESN'T have a problem with it. If he knows its upsetting you and still he continues, then it IS a problem. Let him know that. If he refuses to change could you talk to him about going into counseling with you?
    AprilDJC

    Answer by AprilDJC at 4:27 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • This is why so many people want to keep porn completely out of their marriage. It has an addictive affect that many people cannot resist. A lot of people need more and more extreme to get off and it affects their marriage. Porn sex is not about love, affection, respect, and caring. Porn sex is most often selfish. It is about getting off and nothing more. So when someone gets addicted to it they have a hard time separating fantasy and reality. Also after becoming desensitized, sex is no longer something special saved for the significant person in their life, it becomes more of a handshake. Something done with a lot of people and is no big deal. That is why affairs are common with people addicted to porn.
    I had porn issues myself. Chances are your husband cannot stop this by himself. He needs to seek help for this like any other addiction. If it is affecting your marriage than it needs to be stopped or controlled. Good Luck!!
    aprilmommy123

    Answer by aprilmommy123 at 4:30 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • my hubby and i watch porn together or if i walk in on him, i'll join... but when it gets to be too much or often I kinda flip out on him... i mean he'd go upstairs to our computer room and shut the door. i got so mad i would just walk right in and walk out. Then he'd shut the door again so i'd walk back in and walk back out! Made him SOO furious but i was like "you'd rather sit on a computer wanting to f them, instead of being with your family that you say you care about and spend time together." He slowed down after that big fight. And i know some of it was getting a new porn for us to watch or getting ready to be deployed... we'll see how he is when he gets back
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:41 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • My SO is addicted to porn. Sounds like the same situation as yours. I tried to tell him how I feel too and I have come to the conclusion that it isn't going to go anywhere, maybe worse, if I nag him about it. So, now I either just let him do it or I make fun of him. But what really works... I try to get our 14 month daughter to be as loud as possible. No right person in their mind is going to want to look at porn and do their buisness when your baby daughter or son is in the next room - Evil... but it works... lol
    USNmomwife

    Answer by USNmomwife at 7:38 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Pull the plug.
    He'll go into shock and have withdrawal symptoms, but eventually he will realize that you are the only porn star in his life and become addicted to you instead. :)
    PrydferthMenyw

    Answer by PrydferthMenyw at 7:46 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • My husband and I had a problem with this early on in our relationship and I would get very upset about it...he would simply tell me all guys did it and that it was me who had the problem....asking me why would I be with him and then try to change him...I was burned out with it and one night about 3 am I checked and saw that he had been looking at it earlier the day before...I cried and prayed and had some time with God (whether you believe in him or not this is how it happened). My husband woke to find I was not there and found me in the living room. He asked why was I crying and what was wrong...I told him I saw it again and that I knew this was wrong and that I knew God did not want me treated like this...I told him I would no longer check on him and I was tired and leaving it to be between him and God...His eyes started to well up and I left him there and went to bed...It is now a struggle for him...but he tries very hard.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:55 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

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