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Am I the ONLY parent that cant control their kids? :0(

Im 40 years old and I have a 19 year old dd (who has downs) and a 8 year old ds and a 6 year old dd. For some reason the past two months I cant control my eight and six year old! They wont do anything I say and argue all day till I scream and get a headace!!!
I give up! Im a terrible mother and Im doing something wrong! The only time they do what I say is when DH walks in the door, than it yes mam and no mam! Ugh! What can I do? I know right know I wont be able to handle the summer!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:41 AM on Jun. 2, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • Be firm and consistent. Tell them they are grounded from certain things and stick to it. If they listen to DH then it would stand to reason that they would fear your reporting their missbehavior to him and they would be in trouble once he was home. I know you need to have control while he is gone. I would no longer scream and yell and stress myself out. I would remain calm, dole out what ever punishment I chose and be firm in carrying it out. They will only use you as a door mat as long as you will let them. I would remove every luxury they have. Ipod's video games, cell phones, t.v. friends etc. Total lock down until they get it that I am in charge not them.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 1:37 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Beat their asses
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:43 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Every child has their moments, but when they act up all the time is when you have a problem. You need to find a punishment that works for your situation && you have to be CONSISTENT. Usually, with my son I tell him to stop doing something once && then I begin to count to 3. He knows that if I get to 3 he is either getting a time-out or a spanking, depending on what he is doing, so I usually don't get past 2 && he is finding somethin else to do. but if you don't do something about it every single time then you are just wasting time.
    HisMommySince07

    Answer by HisMommySince07 at 11:47 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • lol Yes, Anon...but with some kids (my 24 DS) would just laugh until his rear was so red he honestly could not sit down.

    As far as getting your kids to listen? Good luck...my stepboys are 3 & 4, they are like rabid wild squirrels most of the time. Taking them to the store is a headache waiting to happen. If you come up with any ideas...please be sure to let us know.

    I assume you've talked to DH about ?
    daisy521

    Answer by daisy521 at 11:49 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • You have to find a punishment that works.

    My friend and her 2 children are the same age. They just moved in with my mom and when they first moved in they thought they were going to pull that crap and continue to disrepect their mother but we laid down some ground rules quickly.

    If they sass, argue, don't do what they are told, etc. we give them ONE warning that if they do not stop they will be grounded from the video game they are so fond of or the TV or won't be able to go to dance class, etc. (something that they WANT to do and get upset when it's taken away).

    Usually a simple warning stops them in their tracks BUT if it doesn't than we follow through with the warning and take away whatever privledge we said we would .

    The key is FOLLOW THROUGH no matter what. If you don't they think they can get away with murder and they will because they no what buttons of yours to push till your at your wits end.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:51 AM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Call SuperNanny! LOL No, it sounds like you may be caving in. It's hard to implement new rules and enforce them, but you need to regain control of your house. Try separating them if you can for a two days and do one kid a day.. or take away all their toys and make them earn the stuff back.. think about what will work for your kids and how you can be consistent. Consistency is the key. You can't let them have control because they are too much to handle.
    Seven07

    Answer by Seven07 at 12:03 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Daisy -The Store issue. I solved this one when I found out our Grocery Store gave out free balloons. He had three chances to follow the three store rules: 1) Don't touch anything 2) No whining and pouting if he asks me for something and I tell him he can't have it 3) No wandering away from the cart If he lost his three chances - no balloon at the end of the shopping trip. He is highly fascinated by balloons and getting it was a big deal for him, so he learned not to act up. Most stores give away free cookies or something, if not balloons. Good luck.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:03 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • As for listening - ours doesn't like to listen either - or immediately "forgets" something you told him literally 5 seconds ago. He has to sit on the couch (time out place), loses his bedtime story, loses computer or tv time, or has to go to bed earlier.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:06 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • P.S. (I'm PP) ...The loss of stuff doesn't always work, but it HELPS!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:10 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

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