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someone watching your child

my boyfriend wants me to leave my daughter with his brohters wife. i dont know her. i dont know most of my bfs family (not very well like i couldnt call any of them up and just start talking) because of a alot of drama and reasons. 1 is they dont speak much english others is they jsut dont like me. i told him i dont know this women he says WELL I DO. would you leave your child with her, she is part of his family but i jsut dont know her and feel werid im been staying home with my daughter for 9 months now and am going back to work. its so sad i dont know where is best for her. she is VERY SHY towards adults she crys hysterically if someone holds her or gets in her face &talks to her. so i think daycare is not the place for her but on the other hand she LOVES little kids she gets so excited around them. also noone can put her to sleep except me so im really confused on what to do, any advice?

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em9x

Asked by em9x at 12:15 PM on Jun. 2, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • i dont think you should leave her with anyone you feel uncomfortable with, despite his feelings. daycare might be good for her, it would break her out of her shell and they have no problems putting babies to sleep. you could have full confidence in them, too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:21 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • if she is the only option maybe you could start spending time with her to get to know her better, go with my guy friends wives and they don't speek alot of english and I wouldn't have left my son with them but now that I got to know them they are really nice and good people, maybe trying to spend time together and see how she does with your daughter anyway would help.
    NicholeAT

    Answer by NicholeAT at 12:31 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • No, I would not leave my son with anybody I didn't feel comfortable with, for one simple reason, he is my world and I wouldn't want any unforeseen thing to happen to him when somebody was watching him that I didn't know, I would feel horribly guilty about that. My husband has suggested numerous times that we leave our son with certain people that he personally knows really well, but I don't. And I have told him that I was not comfortable with that, and he completely understood.

    SecretSuzy

    Answer by SecretSuzy at 12:33 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • depending on where you work or what you and your bf do see if maybe you could work it out to work opposite shifts. If one of you work 1st shift and the other second shift. Otherwise see about spending time with the SIL and getting to know her better. If you speak the language your daughter will pick it up as well, just make sure you can communicate with his SIL. My son stays home with my friend who doesn't speak any English, it's really helping him pick up more Spanish being with her. My friend does live with us, so maybe that makes the differnce. Otherwise do you have family or friends close by that might watch your daughter?
    jombmomi

    Answer by jombmomi at 1:03 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • I wouldn't do it. If you have to leave your child with someone I'd make sure it was someone you know very well. Another reason is the drama between families, if she does something you don't like there could be tensions between you , your bf and his family. It happens all the time. Put your foot down and find someone else.
    itsmesteph11

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 2:00 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • I don't know....It depends i think on if you can trust you SO's judgment. If you know that he wouldn't put your daughter in a bad sitituation then i don't think YOU have to know her. I just think you have to base the desicion on what you know about him.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:25 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

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