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The Fib, posted in General Parenting too.

My son will be 4 in August. He has been on a popsicle kick. I really don't care if he has three in a row, it is summer and it is part of being a kid. However, when he is done eating one he will leave the sticky stick wherever he is at the time. It can be the walk outside or right on the floor in the house. So I have been on him to throw them away. The past two times he has had them I have asked him if he has thrown the stick out and he has said "yes". I later find them under a table etc. I even asked him and then said "so if I go outside I won't find the stick on the porch or walk etc?" He sasy "no" and when I look...sure enough there is the stick. Now he gets no popsicles for awhile. We don't lie, so I wonder where he is getting the idea it is ok. I have explained what a fib is and that it is wrong, but it is not getting me far. Any advice?

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salexander

Asked by salexander at 2:11 PM on Jun. 2, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 26 (28,366 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Kids lie to get a reaction out of you. They want to see if they can get away with it or not. All kids fib from time to time, regardless if their parents lie. They also may be afraid that they are going to get into trouble if they tell you the truth.
    NAT24ROXY24

    Answer by NAT24ROXY24 at 2:13 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • For my son, I make him bring the old stick back before he gets a new one.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:14 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Kids just push their limits. We have a bit of a liar too. Mostly to keep himself out of trouble. Or to get away with having not done something, like your son. I ask him "Have you done your chores" and his response is yes even though I know he hasn't. Things like that. Or "What was that noise" when I am CONVINCED he was just jumping on his bed. Then he starts making up this story about how he was walking and he stepped on uh well stepped on uh this uh uhm. So I know he is making up a lie as we speak, literally. Just make sure you punish him accordingly and continue to enforce the idea that lying is wrong and work in the fact that it can hurt people too. If you are consistent, he will get the point. A friend of mine taught her children by lying about them to her husband when she knew they could hear her. I didn't like the tactic, but it got the point across.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 2:17 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • You just have to be consistent, the whole not letting him have popsicles is a good idea. Then when he DOES get popsicles again, you have to literally WATCH him throw it away every time for a while if not for a couple more years.

    My 5 year old does the same thing. Did you throw that away? Yes! Are you sure? YES! I DID!!!!! Then later I find it on the floor or under a couch. Um.. NO that's not the trash!
    WillDoDa

    Answer by WillDoDa at 2:37 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Oh, then I make her pick up all the mess she has left under the couch or wherever under my watchful and not so happy eye.
    WillDoDa

    Answer by WillDoDa at 2:37 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • I have found that children don't need to be taught to lie. lol. They learn what kind of response they will get from you, what kind of response they want from you and what kind of answer you're looking for. My son (3) has always been a terrific helper. He helps clean up his toys, he helps throw things away including his own things and other people's without being asked, which kind of shocks me sometimes... but I attribute his desire to do so with the approval he gets when he does those things. I think you have to go beyond scolding or consequence (or whatever) when he does something you don't like, to giving lots of praise and positive reaction when he does things you do like. You might do this already... but you didn't mention anything like that so I suggest it. If you want him to throw it away himself, give him a reason to WANT to. :)
    iluvmommyhood58

    Answer by iluvmommyhood58 at 2:38 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

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