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My SO is mad about me getting a job!!

I started a job today that had good benefits like 401K and more pay during weekends. Well, today he got all grouchy saying, "Whos going to watch Tony all day?! It made me so mad!! I found out Ill be working 30 hrs a week and he flipped. He got all nasty with me and found all of these reasons why I cant do this job!!!

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LaurenKaye29

Asked by LaurenKaye29 at 7:47 PM on Jun. 2, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 8 (261 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • maybe he wasn't expecting you to be working that much. but if you are going to have to put your son in daycare is it worth it, or will half your pay go into childcare costs and the other half go to gas/food for while you are at work. if thats the case it may not be worth it at all, and it may be better to try to find something else or just to get something part time in the evenings if you want/need the money or want to get out of the house.
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 7:49 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • i've been looking for a job for eight months now, he can swallow his words that's damn awesome that you even got one
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 7:50 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Tell him to deal with it. Being a sahm isn't for everyone. If you need to work, you need to work, it's a simple as that. You could also say "Hey, I need insurance...if you want to marry me so I can get on your insurance then you're welcome to, otherwise I have to work so I have healthcare."
    ajguinn

    Answer by ajguinn at 7:51 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • I think it's probably a control issue. Or he doesn't want to watch your son. I know i worked for a few weeks shy of a whole year, and he was tickled pink that I was quitting LOL. It's not as easy a job as they think it is until they have to watch them alone. LOL I only worked four hours a day 4 days a week too.

    Either A) he is a control freak and is threatened by your ability to not be dependent on him B) He just doesn't want to watch your son because he has better things to do like work on his car or watch tv and drink beer C)he's freaking out because he's not sure he can handle the responsibility of watching your son and is use to you doing it

    Anyway, you just need to assert yourself and tell him you are doing this for the good of the household. I can't believe(especially in this economy) that he'd be pissed about you working when you are bringing in more money to pay bills(or spend yourself without asking him for $).
    CinderAmethyst

    Answer by CinderAmethyst at 7:51 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • So, do you have someone to watch the baby or is he bent out of shape because he will be expected to do it? Is he working? What is is backround? Does he come from an old school family that thinks women should be seen and not heard? I would tell him he hurt your feelings. Ask him in this economy exactally what is his issue with your contributing to the household income and maybe just maybe having some sense of accomplishment.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 8:50 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • 30 hours a week is cake. Try working 60 hours a week then we can talk about what a cry baby he is!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:10 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • He knows what he's doing, men learn from the children how well tantrums work on us. Good for you for going to work. Hope I can also find a job soon. Best of luck!
    Aneya

    Answer by Aneya at 9:42 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • It sounds like you didn't talk to him about it before you got it. Did you? Who is going to watch Tony? Him? Some men just don't want the burden of childcare and helping around the house. If you didn't talk it out and agree on it though, you probably need to do that now. I wouldn't want my husband making major job changes without consulting me first so I wouldn't do that to him.
    happi-ladi

    Answer by happi-ladi at 10:06 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

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