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How do I help my 5 year old cope with the death of her pet?

My dd got 2 fish for her birthday. This was her very first pet, and the fish she named Cara, becuase she cares a lot, dies this afternoon. She is so upset I can't console her. It took her 10 mintues to allow me to flush it. I have never had this problem. Now she is afraid that her other fish is going to die too. What can I do?


Asked by krissyvelazquez at 8:08 PM on Jun. 2, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 19 (8,028 Credits)
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Answers (4)
  • Talk about it when she wants. Even if it is weeks down the road-talk about it & explain your beliefs. Have her draw a special picture of her fish & right down her happy memories for her. The most important thing I learn is to talk when ever a question is asked. This is a big deal in her but she will lead the way. I think kids have a great way of dealing with what life gives them. My daughters first experience was the death of her preschool teacher-it was really hard to find the right words. Just follow your wee ones lead.

    Answer by Wiggles_GA at 8:49 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Awe...I know that must be hard for you and her! My sons first experience with death was when he was a little younger and it was a cat so we got the book Cat Heaven . there is also a Dog Heaven but I don't think that there is a book called Fish Heaven yet. :0) Just do the best you can and answer all of her questions. Let her know that it is a nartural part of life and that it's okay to be sad. Also talk to her about what ever your beliefs ar at home about what happens to person when they die. If you have no personal beliefs then maybe consider giving her some options by saying some people think that...and others think that... it may help her to adjust better to have a better understanding of what death means. I hope she feels better soon!

    Answer by But_Mommie at 8:22 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Body double next time

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:54 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • This could be a good oppurtunity to teach her about things like this. It is hard and very difficult for them to understand. Just explain it happens and maybe she can get another one.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:34 AM on Jun. 3, 2009