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My 4-yead-old Keeps having "accidents," What do I do?

For the past month my 4 year old daughter has been wetting her self, with increasing frequency while we are home. She has been potty trained for more than two years, and we are just starting to potty train my nearly 2 year old son. She never has this problem while we are out in public, but seems to have an accident when we are home all day. I am at my wits end. I don't know what to do, and nothing I have tried is making things better. She even refuses to admit that she has had an accident when she is standing there soaked in a puddle of her own urine. I need this to stop, I am absolutely flabbergasted. Please, help?

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:11 PM on Jun. 2, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (7)
  • dont let it get to you thats probably whats feeding the behavior now.... just say "ok lets go wash up" and DONE OVER kind of ignore it... BUT and this is a big BUT praise other stuff through out the day for her... so if she finishes her dinner tell her "that's great I love it when you do big girl stuff" and give her some more 1:1--- sounds like an attention getter if you ask me my kids are the same age as yours 4 and 2-- when I started potty training my son in March my daughter did the same thing and I mentioned it to the pediatrician at work and he told me to do this and it stopped in about 3 days

    Answer by MELRN at 10:19 PM on Jun. 2, 2009

  • Ihave a daughter who's turning 5. she still wets the bed. i honestly dont know what t do either. i cut her off at 6pm from getting anything to drink and make her go to the bathroom b4 bed. nothing seems to help. if you find out anything plz let me know.

    Answer by mommyof302 at 2:05 AM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • Well this is one of those things that you need to not make a huge deal over. Its similar to my issue of my son who poops on himself. I took him to the doc to make sure there were no med issues and he said...this is a control issue. Meaning he knows he can control this and I cant. Its more of an emotional issue than a physical problem. Just say...okay, go clean yourself, and take your clothes to the laundry room. Give her a basket for them so they dont make anything else smell like pee. I ve done everything I know to stop this behavior. My son is 7, so its not cute anymore. Come to find out after talking to a few other moms. This is common. I felt better because I thought I had done something wrong with this child...LOL. I know she will outgrow this for sure, but until she does, know that nothing you do will make this stop. She has to choose it. Praise her when she doesnt!

    Answer by momofsaee at 8:48 AM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • My niece is 4 and has night-time accidents. It makes me wonder if they are so stuctured during the day (she's in Pre-K now, first year of school), that at night she just lets loose. Maybe day-time is the only time that they can keep it together. Interesting that alot of 4 y/o's have this problem.

    Answer by doodlebopfan at 8:50 AM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • Ihave a daughter who's turning 5. she still wets the bed. i honestly dont know what t do either. i cut her off at 6pm from getting anything to drink and make her go to the bathroom b4 bed. nothing seems to help. if you find out anything plz let me know.
    This is a totally different issue. Many kids wet until far past 5. My dd wet until she was 11 and my son is 7 and hes a wetter too. Its not in their control. Its a bladder maturity thing. Her bladder is not sending the signals to the brain to wake her up yet. Give her time and do not even mention this as a problem. You dont want make it worse by making her feel like shes doing something wrong. Just have her help you with the sheets or put a pull up on her. By the time they are 7 to 8, there are meds available and also there are alarms you can try. We had to do meds. My dd's self esteem was plummeting. Good luck.

    Answer by momofsaee at 8:51 AM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • first, don't make a big deal of it. second make sure she doesn't have a bladder infection.
    or maybe there has been a change in her life that can trigger it to.
    Just simply have her take off the wet clothes after cleaning her allow her to put dry ones back on.
    if she feels/smells the dirty clothes it will help her remember to use the potty.
    whatever you do DON'T call her a baby

    Answer by maiahlynn at 1:14 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • my 4 year old went through this phase.. i am sure it was a control thing... she only did it right after we left one place and were headed to another... so she very easily could have gone potty at the first or she should be able to hol dit until the second (or home)... she'd pee in my car... (my new car by the way, I got it in december and this phase began on christmas day and ended about a month ago as far as I know) I reall do think she was in her own way trying to see how much she could control by using her new ":weapon" she knew we'd pull over... I made her clean herself up and clean up the car seat after the first couple of times and also made sure to make her go potty before we went anywhere. I think making her clean up the mess was most effective, she didn't wanna touch her dirty britches any more than I did.

    Answer by LuckyClown at 1:49 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

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