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Is anyone expecting for the first time and scared of your baby(ies) coming?

I'm a first time mother-to-be and am now 6 months pregnant. I guess I feel like I don't have enough time left to better prepare myself for their arrival. I'm scared that I won't be good enough... I suppose this would be a better question to discuss with a therapist but if you happen to have words of wisdom to lift a stranger's spirits anything is greatly appreciated.

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:52 AM on Jun. 3, 2009 in Pregnancy

Answers (8)
  • i had/ have the same problem honestly i cried and it made me feel alot better just try to talk about it with your SO and just let it out it really helps im sorry you feel like that but it's completely normal to feel that way

    Answer by freshly.married at 4:01 AM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • We all feel this way. Knowledge, though, truly is power. Go to your local library and check out a couple of parenting books; this will help you find your style. Touchpoints by T. Berry Brazelton is a wonderul book on development. Penelope Leach helped me with learning to choose my battles and set parenting priorities and not be so uptight.

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:02 AM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • I agree with reading a few parenting books but truthfully, the best thing to do is allow yourself to go with the flow. There are going to be times when your kids stump you, ya know, you won't know exactly what to do... good thing there's Cafemom, because then you can just come on and ask... but if you chill out and realize that noone can really be fully prepared, and just get as prepared as you can, you'll be much happier.

    When your baby(babies?) come home, you'll be okay. You won't get much sleep at night at first so when they sleep during the day, you sleep too. Just keep them close and when they wake up, you'll know. It'll all be okay.

    Oh, and if you're going to bottle feed, (I had to) be careful with that first bottle, take it slow. I gagged my first baby by accident and just about had a heartattack :P You can PM me if you want to... :D

    Answer by Gremlyn at 6:12 AM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • I have the parenting boooks and to be honest they dont help me at all im still freaking out

    Answer by jennbear22 at 11:04 AM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • Now that I know what newborns are like I probably should have been more worried! It's tough work! Seriously though, I was way too worried about what other people thought. I was worried people would think I was too young or unprepared, even though I'm 28,( I know really stupid.) But now that I'm a mother and my DD is 3 mos. old, I could give a shit about what other people think. I have raised her, i have nourished her with my own body and I have put in all the late nights. You will be too busy to worry about your own abilities as a mother, trust me.

    Answer by danielp at 12:00 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • I think we've all been there. It's a scary time. Big changes, and there are so many "horror stories" of child birth. From the time I was 3 months pregnant with my son I had the worst nightmares. I had never ever had nightmares this bad. I was terrified to sleep for a while (which we all know it is impossible to not sleep while pregnant :) ). Anyway, my doctor referred me to a therapist and we worked through the fears I was having about Rylan coming. I think it's normal to be scared when you are pregnant with your first. Talk to those around you! Your mom, your friends, sisters...everyone. Let them know you are scared, and you need support. Even letting cafemomers know. I've been told, not every parent is an awful parent, and if you are worried about it now, then you probably have nothing to worry about. You'll be a great mommy! Feel free to message me if you need someone to listen :) Good luck!!!

    Answer by katie1381 at 1:27 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • Haha! I'm 6 months too! I'm terrified but at the same time I want him OUT!

    Answer by xCalliex at 5:56 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • With my first baby, I NEVER read any parenting books/magazines at all. All my friends did. I guess I just thought I'd be able to handle it with my own instincts. And guess what? I was right. She's 9 years old now and a very nice little girl. All her teachers like her b/c she's quiet but very friendly and kind to the other kids.
    Then, there's my 3 year old...for some reason I felt I needed to read any and everything I could get my hands on. He was challenging from the beginning and still is. He's a BOY. And even after reading all that I did, he's who he is and it was really all for naught. I think reading that stuff made me more crazy/frazzled than had I read nothing at all.
    Anyway, just know you'll do fine. You'll be a different person when the baby's born, but you'll ADAPT just like you do with everything else in your life.

    Answer by mybabies at 9:39 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

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