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More jokes for u! "How fight starts"


My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, 'What's on TV?'


I said, 'Dust.'

And then the fight started...

Answer Question
 
Albi1623

Asked by Albi1623 at 3:18 PM on Jun. 3, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (24)
  • My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
    She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3
    seconds.'

    I bought her a scale.

    And then the fight started...
    Albi1623

    Answer by Albi1623 at 3:19 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace
    expensive... so, I took her to a gas station.

    And then the fight started...
    Albi1623

    Answer by Albi1623 at 3:19 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for
    Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's
    license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had
    left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I
    would have to go home and come back later.

    The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing
    my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is
    proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application.

    When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
    Social Security office.

    She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
    disability, too.'

    And then the fight started...
    Albi1623

    Answer by Albi1623 at 3:19 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
    kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
    nearby table.

    My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'

    'Yes,
    ' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
    drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she
    hasn't been sober since.'

    'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on
    celebrating that long?'

    And then the fight started...
    Albi1623

    Answer by Albi1623 at 3:19 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my
    order first.

    "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please."

    He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?""

    Nah, she can order for herself."

    And then the fight started...
    Albi1623

    Answer by Albi1623 at 3:20 PM on Jun. 3, 2009


  • A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
    She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel
    horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a
    compliment.'

    The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'

    And then the fight started.....
    Albi1623

    Answer by Albi1623 at 3:20 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95.

    Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95.

    I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold
    cream.

    And then the fight started....
    Albi1623

    Answer by Albi1623 at 3:20 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • My wife asked me if a certain dress made her butt look big. I told her
    not as much as the dress she wore yesterday

    and then the fight started.....
    Albi1623

    Answer by Albi1623 at 3:20 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • laughing

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:20 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

  • A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies.

    Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside.

    The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man
    'Holy crap. That must be my husband!'

    So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked jumped out the
    window. He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush

    and to his car as fast as he could go.

    A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and screamed
    at the woman, 'I AM your husband!'

    The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?'

    And then the fight started.....

    ------------ --------- --------- --------- ---------
    Albi1623

    Answer by Albi1623 at 3:20 PM on Jun. 3, 2009

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