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what do you do,when your teen keep getting jumped

We have tried changing his classroom,but, I can't take no more,a little history,my grandson may be gay ,he is 15 yr. old,he didn't tell us at first ,he was getting picked on,the school called us and told us,those boys were expelled ,but,when does it stop,the sad thing is,the therapist said,he isn't gay,he just tends to be not as tough as boys his age,he chooses to wear a tie and shirt to school,I keep telling him to ignore simple people,but,how long does he have to suffer,we are thinking of home schooling him,please help.And,yes this has caused him to be depressed,as of now,he talks with a therapist,but medication isn't needed.


Asked by Anonymous at 3:59 PM on Jun. 4, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • MammaBella: you must be one of those that picks on other kids for the fun of it. You are so cold hearted. There is a huge difference between normal teenage teasing and being bullied. This boy is being bullied. When someone is afraid of going to school, is in counseling for depression, it is not normal. He does not need to "grow a set, suck it up or wear something else." He is not a loser either. Being bullied is NOT life, it is done by ignorant, rude and immature kids.

    OP: Seeing he will be graduating in a few weeks, it is really too late to say something to the school. I agree with the martial arts as a way to build his selfesteem, it really does help. Keep him in the counseling as it will help him build his selfesteem and help him to learn to ignore rude and ignorant people (like MammaBella). Keep being there for him and do what you need to keep him safe and happy.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:10 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • Ugh, some kids are punks. My baby is only 2 so i dont have any experience with it, so i dont have any "real" advice. But have you thought of maybe changing schools? He may have to go further away, and you may have to drive him instead of catching the bus or something, but maybe just getting him away from that group of kids would help. He's probably an easy target for bullies. Somehow i guess he'll just have to learn to be more assertive in dealing with people like that, and not be intimidated.

    Answer by MommaTurbo at 4:06 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • you may want to try some martial art classes. not to have him to fight back but maybe to build his self-confidents. if you find a good teacher they will become a mentor. plus if it came down to it he wouldn't be afraid of the other boys and could defend himself.

    Answer by northcarolinama at 4:32 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • Have you asked your son what he wants? At 15 he should certainly at least be asked for input. If he is miserable at school do whatever you have to do to find an alternative. Home school, private schools, charter schools, transfer within the district. There are a lot of options. I have a son I dealt with a lot of bullying with. He was depressed and looked to drugs eventually to kill/mask the pain he was in inside. Please do something before that happens. Good kids turn to drugs just like any other kid.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 4:51 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • Thank you ladies for all your suggestions,and,yes we do ask him his input,its just awful,we have to take him to school and pick him up everyday,if,we can get through the next week,he should be better,he graduates in about 2 weeks,the hard thing,because he is a young man,I think he's tired of crying to us,we teach him to look the other way, we keep telling him to pray for peace,but,he just told me,how long do you want me to keep quiet.I have never been through nothing like this,the other kids don't have a problem. Thank you all again.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:04 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • id get him into some self defence classes so he can atleast defend himself when need be...theres really nothing to do to make the other kids stop...theyll do it no matter what but what you can do is prepare him so he knows how to handle a potentially dangerous situation

    Answer by hug4akiss at 8:20 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • Stories like this make me laugh as a teen still in high school. Tell him to grow a set and if he doesnt like getting picked on to wear something else or suck it up. Tell him not to take everyone so seriously and to grow up. This wont stop, he's a loser. The most he can do is ignore them, or fight back, but do it right or he will get ridicules even more. This is life, live it or piss off.

    Answer by MammaBella at 8:24 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • MammaBella..You obviously have never been picked on and are most likely the one doing the picking, but I think you should have taken your own advice and grow up, then you would have made better choices and if you actually went to school and paid attention in sex-ed you would be a teenager in high school not a teen Mom in high school. And in the real world what is happening to this kid is called harassment and ort assault and that is against the law.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:54 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • Have you spoken with the school administration? Most schools have a zero tolerance policy on bullying, though this is really bordering on a hate crime; you may want to contact PFLAG or the ACLU.

    Answer by rkoloms at 1:48 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • OP here, it took me a whole month to find this post again,I was so disturbed at MammaBella remarks, it made me think of all the hardship and hurt my grandson had to endured,this is a so-called mother attacking a child who needed help,to all the beautiful mothers who wrote comments, I want to tell you,my grandson graduated,he did well on outgoing scores, he is in therapy ,by his choice. Thank you again ladies.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:43 PM on Jul. 14, 2009