Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I'm very strong headed and stubborn. So is my fiance'. How do we prevent a clashing?

I believe I make him feel inferior in a way because I was exposed to certain things and situations that he wasn't; maybe he feels like I'm some "know-it-all", I don't know, but when we both feel strongly about something and we bump heads, what should we do to keep the peace? I've asked him this and talked to him about it and he says we should listen to what the other one has to say. I need a bit more originality than that though. Help!

Answer Question
 
His_Mommy26

Asked by His_Mommy26 at 10:42 PM on Jun. 4, 2009 in Relationships

Level 4 (32 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Compromise and listening...you BOTH have to do that to make things work.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:53 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • He's right. You have to listen and find some middle ground. You'd be surprised at what you learn in life and about that other person when you look past yourself and REALLY listen. Yes there will be times you fight, but you have to recognize that sometimes being right isn't worth being miserable and be the one to "give in" and apologize.
    abbynzachsmommy

    Answer by abbynzachsmommy at 11:45 PM on Jun. 4, 2009

  • We are the same characters you two are. A lot of times he defers to me because I am always right. LOL But with the cars bike and other stuff it's all him. I'm mostly home, baby, cleaning, safety, fashion.. when we clash we debate and make jokes. You learn how to work together in time. How to nag or bribe without seeming like that's what it is.. How to bitch and not piss him off. I was pissed he hadn't shoveled he left our shovel at his parents and our walk had snow and ice all over it and I was pregnant working in an office still wearing nice shoes... I told him I didn't care how he got it done tonight I wanted it done. I said, "It's not my fault you didn't pick up the shovel! the walk needs done! If you don't have the shovel that's not an excuse! Use a spoon!!" We both laughed and I still slipped in the morning before catching myself, but I wasn't as mad. It still bugged me until he did it though!
    Seven07

    Answer by Seven07 at 12:27 AM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • Oh and another time I would always ask him to put the trash out at night so if he slept in he didn't have to hurry to get it and one night he didn't he was watching a movie.. So I got up and shut the screen door and the glass door and went back to bed to bitch about it I didn't want to take it out myself and when he went to take it out he ran into the screen door whihc is usually open. LMAO
    Seven07

    Answer by Seven07 at 12:29 AM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • He's right but he didn't tell you how to achieve that. Now that is something you both will have to work on and develop together. As to preventing bumping heads, it's not going to happen. You should expect it and hopefully keeping your cool when it does happen will go a long way in seeking a compromise if one is needed.
    isabellalecour

    Answer by isabellalecour at 8:45 AM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • communication....and compromise...
    babygoins09

    Answer by babygoins09 at 3:47 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.