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Struggling with the idea of a gun in my home. How can I get past this so hubby and I can agree? I believe in all the gun safety and so does he, I believe in teaching my children, so does he, but its me that has an issue with it.

I just want to start off by saying that I believe in a persons right to bear arms and all that it entails. I believe in teaching my children the right way to handle guns and the respect that should go with it. My issue isnt really with my children being around guns. Its that I am not comfortable around them. The thought of even shooting a gun makes me cringe. I was born to parents in the Ministry...LOL. So usually Pastors and church piano players dont have guns in their home. I remember my brother having a 22 when he was a teen, but it wasnt of any interest to me. I guess my being female has really hindered my interest in guns, but dh wants one. His brother has a few and he just wants one. I dont know why. He says its because we are moving to the woods and we might have wild animals. I dont know how much truth is in that. So I told him I wasnt comfortable with this. I wasnt trying to go all liberal on him, but I ...cont.

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momofsaee

Asked by momofsaee at 5:38 PM on Jun. 5, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 4 (56 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • am not comfortable with a gun in my home. It just makes me cringe at the thought. I am not afraid of my kids getting a hold of it, Im not afraid of intruders, I think I am just afraid of the GUN ITSELF. Does that make sense at all?? I feel like Im stifling his manhood....LOL. I think most men want guns or 4 wheelers or anything else thats fast and makes noise. Here in the south, anyway. The thought of even holding one makes my skin crawl. I am just concerned that I will obsess that its in the home and not be able to sleep at night or even function. I feel crazy even admitting this. What can I do to get past this? SHould I just make myself get comfortable? or stand my ground? This is really bothering me.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 5:41 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • You're not crazy at all. You can certainly call your local gun shop or an NRA representative and see about taking a class. Knowledge is power and knowledge kills fear.

    I also wouldn't have a gun in my home, but I'm not scared of them at all.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 5:43 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • My husband is a police officer so we have several. My biggest concern is safety with our daughter when she is big enough to explore our home. My advice to you is to take a gun safety course and go to a shooting range and learn how to shoot it. Become comfortable with it. The unknown can be scary but the more knowledge you have on guns the more comfortable you will become.
    cdecker83

    Answer by cdecker83 at 5:46 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • I agree with above. Take some classes you can find them everywhere, most states offer hunter safety course for minimal money. I think it isn't the gun you are afraid of but the unknown factor that comes with them (I hope that made sense!). I think if you gain some real life knowedge you will relax a little more about the thought of it.

    Way to go though in realizing that this is "your" issue, a lot of woman just say outright NO to them.
    luckysevenwow

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 5:49 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • Oh thanks ladies. Glad to know Im not nutso. Really I know that Im not crazy, but I could not explain this to my husband. He said "I respect what youre saying, but no I dont understand". He really did try to hear me out, but the female mind is complicated, I guess. Ive struggled with PPD, so I know all the nasty thoughts that run through my head. I guess I felt like one more thing to torment me was not what I needed. During my PPD phases (they were short lived, thank goodness), all the fears I ever had would come barrelling out of me. I even made up things to be afraid of. I dont call the shots in my home, and neither does hubby, so it was important that we agree and our discussion wasnt going anywhere. I will try and push past my issue and we can take this class together. **the thought makes me sick, but I will do it for him**
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 5:57 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • My husband recently told me he wants a gun for protection. This is something I am absolutely not comfortable with. I do not feel safe 


    g a gun in my house with my child. Right now the subject has been dropped, but I don't know what I'll do if he brings it up again. I would feel differently if he were a hunter or used a gun regularly. I think gun safety is taught more effectively when the parents actually use guns. The thought of a gun sitting in a box in the closet for my son to stumble across is something I can't risk.


    I hope you get some good advice because I don't know what to do either.

    MAUREEN55

    Answer by MAUREEN55 at 5:58 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • I agree with what the other PP's said, your not crazy. Just try and get as informed as you can.

    We've had guns since before we had kids. They are locked in a safe but it's a decorative one so it's on display. Guns locked separate from ammo and then there is a lock on the triggers. Knowledge is power but that extends to you teaching your children about guns. Both my kids have been looking at guns since they were babies and so their curiosity is non-existant for now. They know that guns are nothing to joke about and arn't allowed to pretend to shoot or aim a gun (toy or fingers) at people. If my kids want to look at the guns they are allowed to with either dh or myself.

    As far as your comfort try starting with something simple like an air soft gun and work your way up. It has the look and feel of a gun with less intimidation. Good luck!
    sadira29

    Answer by sadira29 at 7:18 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • Get a safe, a good one, to store the gun(s) in. And take a safety course. I agree with the other poster, knowledge is power. Maybe even take a target shooting class. My family are big hunters. I honestly don't like hunting that much, just not something I'm into, but I really like doing target shooting. We have shotguns and we do a lot of sporting clay shooting. It's actually a lot of fun! And at this one gun club my family belongs to, there is a women's clay shooting league. Female bonding AND you get your aggression out!
    ap9902

    Answer by ap9902 at 7:22 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • Yeah, I agree with the safe.

    What we're getting is a biometric safe. It uses fingerprint ID to even open the safe up. That way no worry about kids getting a hold of the key or the knowing combination. We're also doing gun safety and when my girl is older, she'll do it too(she's only 3).

    We do not own a gun just yet, but we're thinking about it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:24 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • Female bonding AND you get your aggression out!
    _______________
    Now, I LOVE that idea. My best friend has a Glock handgun and she loves to go target shooting with her oldest son. Her ex hubby and brother and nieces work for Glock so shes been around guns all her life. However, I was her main support when her and her dh were having major issues because of his drinking and his verbal abuse. She left him because he was so out of control. Their handgun was in the top of their closet and the ammo was fairly close by. He was so depressed and so out of his mind that he got the gun out and put it in the bed with him. She heard him move the stool over in the closet and her instinct was right. She grabbed her son and left quickly after she went in and confirmed it was gone. She called him on the phone and said why did you move the gun? He acted like she was the crazy one. These are people you would never think would have issues.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 7:34 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

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