Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What's your excuse for staying with a partner that cheated on you?

Mine was... I'm pregnant, he's the father, I have to make this work!

A lot of help that did for myself AND my son. Something I'll definitely never do EVER again!

Answer Question

Asked by rainfalls at 8:56 PM on Jun. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Level 2 (6 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • Well my DH hasn't cheated on me, but if he did, I'd probably stay with him for our children. I grew up with divorced parents and it was hard, so I wouldn't want to put my kids through that.

    Answer by ABPeterson at 8:58 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • folks screw up. See if he's remorseful and if so, give him another shot. Men are not made to be monogamous imo but you can try to get him to cut that crap out. If he's a good man, he'll stop. If he's not a good man (or if he's a sex addict) then you may have a problem

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:59 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • Nope. There is no way I would ever have an interest in him at all. Once a cheater, always a cheater in my book. Nope, no way.. Hit the door. I am so done with you.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:00 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • I didn't "stay". He left, & I let him leave. It was HE who called crying months later talking about what a mistake he made & how he wanted his family back (we weren't married, but had a young son at the time).

    Cliff's Notes Version of events that followed: He moved to where I'd moved to (500+ miles away), he lived in a hotel 'til his $ ran out, he lived in his truck while looking for a job, he then lived in a homeless shelter for several months while working 3 jobs & giving me every cent he didn't need, he lived in my dad's travel trailer, finally was able to get his own apt, lived there working 3 jobs & kissing my ass for over a year until we were "back together".

    Fast Fwd to today: Married going on 8 yrs, 4 kids, haven't even had an arguement in over 3 yrs.

    Sh*t happens - especially when you're young & stupid. He proved himself, EARNED his way back into my life & appreciates "us" more BECAUSE of the whole exp.

    Answer by Laura1229 at 9:13 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • at least he told me.... it was HORRIBLE but I also know he feels horrible still. It hasn't happened since... well, yet anyways and I know one more time, i'm GONE.. taking our dd and she won't EVER see him again! In my mind, cheating means you disregard your SO and the family you have together. If your gunna put it on the line like that you obviously do not care about the effects towards the people you hurt. I told him that too! If he hadn't have told me, I never would have known and my SO really can't hold a secret from me...

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:26 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • I always said I would 'leave' if my boyfriend or husband cheated on me... but when you have kids in the picture is makes it so much harder... HOWEVER.. I rather have my parents divorce than two unhappy people living together. I grew up with that for 16 years.. my dad cheating on my mom... She stayed and was miserable. He was so verbally abusive.. so yeah.. divorce saved our family I believe.

    Sometimes staying together is worse for the kids. Sorry that was a bit off topic...

    Answer by rainfalls at 9:39 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • BUT.. now that I have experienced being cheated on and staying with him (as he continued to cheat on me) I will NEVER do that again.

    Answer by rainfalls at 9:42 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • I love him, I know he loves me, there is nobody I am more comfortable with, I cannot imagine life without him by my side, he is an amazing, loving father, and...I am, sadly, dependent on him right now.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:59 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • I don't know how can some stay, I think I couldn't with or without children, I will take everything away from him. He knows if he is ever going to cheat on me he better make sure is the screw of his life because it will cost him everything, his family, his son, his money. I would destroy every piece of what I though we had. Our son will become my son, his assets will become my assets, the life we built together, I would destroy with no hesitation. man, I would make it my mission to make sure, he never ever sees his son ever again.

    Answer by bebita at 10:29 PM on Jun. 5, 2009

  • it was mainly for my son. we've worked through it. i've forgiven but not forgotten

    Answer by ssnelson26 at 1:18 AM on Jun. 6, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.