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What should I do?

My SO shut me out yesterday because he was hungover...he is an alcoholic. I wrote him an e-mail last night explaining how I felt and how he makes me feel when he does this to me.

We have been together for two years and he says that he loves me and wants to be with me but his actions show differently.

This morning I seen that he was on his facebook but there wasn't and still isn't a response to my e-mail from him. I want to write him a simple e-mail telling him that I'm obviously not that important to him and that I get the hint that he doesn't want to be with me because if he did, he would have written me back instead of playing on his facebook.

What do you think I should do?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:16 AM on Jun. 6, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Move on, doesnt sound like a good situation. If you are the one who is unhappy (which anyone would be) then why is he making all the calls? If he loves you and wants to be with you, then he NEEDS to get sober until then dont be with him! Sorry...
    mrsmamaj

    Answer by mrsmamaj at 10:34 AM on Jun. 6, 2009

  • I'm so sorry, hun.

    It sounds like he's at a place where alcohol is his priority - and as long as that's happening, you can't be.

    I know what I would do but I am not you and can only say - I hope you find the best solution for you and your children (I'm assuming since you're on cafemom there ARE kids involved).

    Best of luck - You might check into meetings for the loved ones of addicts should you stay with him.
    AAAMama

    Answer by AAAMama at 10:57 AM on Jun. 6, 2009

  • im sorry you feel that way! thats horrible! i say you should move on and be with someone who makes you his number one priority! if he can so easily choose alcohol over you then what else will he chose over you ya know? besides every woman deserves a good man that will love them and take care of them mentally physically and financially
    kuuipo317

    Answer by kuuipo317 at 11:17 AM on Jun. 6, 2009

  • I WOULDN'T SEND ANOTHER E-MAIL, TO SAY WHAT YOU ALREADY KNOW, THE FACT THAT HE HAS NOT DESPONDED SHOULD LET YOU KNOW HE COULD CARE LESS ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS, HE HAS ISSUES AND THAT IS NOT EVEN HIS FOCUS SO WHAT MAKES YOU THINK HE WILL TAKE THE TIME OUT FROM HIS BUSY SCHEDULE OF DRINKING TO RESPOND TO THE ONE HE CLAIMES TO LOVE AND HAS BEEN DATING FOR TWO YEARS. WHEN A MAN IGNORES YOU IT'S BECAUSE HE DON'T WANT TO EXPRESS, DISCUSS WHAT YOUR FEELINGS ARE, YOU DON'T NEED TO TELL HIM ONCE AND MUCH LESS TWICE HE KNOW'S WHAT HE'S DOING WHEN HE GETS DRUNK I'M SURE THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME, DON'T ALLOW HIM TO WLAK ALL OVER YOU MIS-TREAT YOU AND THEN YOU TELL HIM YOUR HURT AND TO ADD INSALT TO INJURY HE DON'T EVEN RERSPOND! SO DO YOU THINK TWO E-MAILS WILL MAKE A DIFFERENCE? I SAY IGNORE HIS ASS DON'T ANSWER HIS CALLS AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS? ALSO HE NEEDS HELP UNTIL THEN WHAT GOOD IS HE TO YOU OR HIMSELF?
    mememommie

    Answer by mememommie at 12:21 PM on Jun. 6, 2009

  • some ppl don't want to discuss important matters in an email. Maybe he thinks you two should discuss things in person.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:21 PM on Jun. 6, 2009

  • He doesn't like to dicuss things in person either...I think it's because he feels like he can do no wrong and when I tell him how he made me feel, he can't handle it. He gets mad and starts threating me like crap and even blames me for making him this way.

    He usually uses e-mail to express important matters because it's an easy way out for him. This way he can tell me that he's not coming over and then ignore my e-mails and phone calls because he knows that I am going to be upset.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:38 PM on Jun. 6, 2009

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