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am I bad?

my daughter is 3 1/2 months old. I love her to death. She sees my mom everyday(we're best friends) so I feel comfortable leaving my daughter with her.
I've gone out 3 times since she was born. she is so even tempered and I know she is being cared for.
When I go out I do miss her, but I dont get emotinal/guilty like other moms.
I think it's good for her to be able to function without me or daddy for afew hours.
Do any other moms not have a problem going out occaisionally?
I see some moms on here saying they don't go out for the first year! this seems crazy to me...

Answer Question

Asked by BambiF at 11:12 AM on Jun. 7, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 12 (738 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Nope. I feel the same way. My DS is 6 1/2 mo old and he goes to Grandma's every weekend. Not the whole weekend, but one night. At first I went crazy the few times he stayed away from me, but I love my "me" time and DF and I's "us" time.

    Answer by KareemsMami at 11:16 AM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • LOL, I was one of those attached overly protective parents and now I leave her every chance I get! ;-)
    You're not bad, you just have a very good relationship with your mother and it's great that you have that trust level with her. If my mom was alive I would probably have felt comfortable leaving my daughter with her at a young age. As it is, I think I started letting her stay with my MIL when she was a few months old. I didn't feel guilty at all, just worried constantly b/c I'm like that.
    My take: Go you! and Go Mom!

    Answer by AndrisMom at 11:18 AM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • no, i would rather have my daughter with me.. i hate leaving her when most of the time i can take her along.. and i feel guilty when i do, at least at 5 1/2 months.

    Answer by sunshinebaby209 at 11:41 AM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • I think that it is absolutely fine and healthy that you are able to leave your daughter with your mother. She will be able to have a great relationship with her grandmother and you will be able to keep your sanity by going out sometimes. With my first daughter I didn't leave her until she was nearly a year old and we both ended up having a really bad time. Of course you want your child to be well bonded with you, but if you don't leave her sometimes, she will get extremely anxious when she finally is left with someone other than you. It's important for babies to learn that other people are able to meet her needs besides Mom and Dad. I'm sure your mother loves the time with her grand baby too!

    Answer by MamaApril2 at 11:54 AM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • I love my kids but I would get out alone with DH whenever I could, which isn't that often. When our youngest was 6 months and our oldest 1 1/2 we left them for two nights with my inlaws to go away for our anniversary. It was great to get some full nights of sleep! From the beginning we have tried to get out may once every other month. I think that it is something that is needed and necessary. I don't feel guilty. They are either with my parents or my inlaws and are being taking care of very well, even spoiled.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:00 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • it's okay to have a break. you're lucky your baby is so even-tempered that you are able to have a break like that. my daughter was the same. my son, not so much.

    Answer by jcsmummy at 12:10 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • my dd was 6 weeks wheni left her the first was with a family friend..i clled every 15 minutes to check on her and as the night grew on i called less frequently...after that i had no problems leaving her with my mom or my family friend i didnt do it offten but when i need me time i took it so i wouldnt be so stressed

    Answer by rainmommy at 12:29 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • i commend you for being able to go out. i had a very hard time doing it and at about 18 months i reached my breaking point. its alot easier when you have a trusted person watching about your baby. i started leaving my son by dropping him off with a friend to go to the gym for an hour or so...and now at 24 months...i think i could take an over night break but never really get the chance. it really is good for you and your baby.

    Answer by brodysmama23 at 1:02 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • I would go crazy if I didn't get away from my son atleast once in a while. Even if its for an hour, it is better than nothing. DH and I have been out once together since DS was born. Ive gone out 3X and left DS with DH and had a few drinks. Ive also left him so that I can go work out at the gym. I even left him over night for the first time and enjoyed my friends batchelorette party (I was gone for 24 hours and he was left with my sister). Not to mention he went to a sitter from 2-9 months b/c I worked parttime.

    Answer by mag12305cmg at 5:34 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

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