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Do I forgive and forget?

I have been friends with these girls since I was 12 years old. We all were very close. We ended up going to the same college to run track. We were thrilled. I was dating this guy on the team and they all approached me to tell me he was cheating on me. They told me to choose. Either cut him loose or they would not be my friends anymore. I was floored. What they did not know at the time was that I was pregnant. So I choose him. I never thought they really meant what they said. However they never spoke to me again. I even had to change roommates and move to another dorm because she was on the track team too and wanted me out. I was extremely hurt. Later they learned I had a baby and they never said a word. I dropped out but later graduated from a different college. I bumped in to one of them today. Now they want to be friends again as if nothing ever happened. They left me when I needed them. Is it my fault? or should I let it go

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:03 PM on Jun. 7, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • If you feel the relationship will benefit you in some way, otherwise, why bother?

    Answer by writeon at 5:05 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • im not understanding why they turned on you to that extreme.
    not sure i wold be friends with them ever again after that, because the trust would be really hard to have.

    Answer by 2barnettkids at 5:07 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • well first i would ask them what the hell they were trying to acomplish with their little freeze out. Then just go from there. If they say they are sorry for everything and they know how bad it hurt you then forgive and forget. But if they still stand my what they did then walk away.

    Why didnt you tell them at the time that you were pg?

    Answer by Amanda7891 at 5:09 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • They are losers. I dont know why they didnt want to be friends with you even if he was cheating on you. thats wrong, dont be friends with people like that. remember what they did and that will make you stay away from them. They are just a bunch of negative energy people.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:11 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • Wow I don't think I could take having friends like that. Honey, they should have stood by you no matter what. Especially when they haven't appologized for being so cold to you when you really needed them. Its up to you but me, I would tell them the truth. You needed them and they judged you and shunned you.

    Answer by pnwmom at 5:16 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • I was scared and 20 years old. That is why I did not tell them. I did not want a pity party. I don't know why they turned on me. One of the girls on the team told me they were jealous because I was the prettier one and hated the attention I got. I really don't know I thought we all were a good looking group. I did find out later he cheated. I even told them thanks for trying to protect me. But they still just moved on. The guy and I did stay together for awhile. We were even engaged. It just never worked. I cried for almost an hour today after I saw her at the mall. It has been over 16 years and I never forgot how bad they hurt me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:20 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • People grow and change, that was then and this is now! I bet they have grown up a lot, and maybe it will be good for you to get over that part of your life by talking to them and working it out! If you feel that you could be friends with them then go ahead with it, but if you feel that you were hurt to badly then forget about them.

    Answer by mrsmamaj at 6:02 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • if knowing this person will add something positive to your life then by all means let it go. If it only brings up negative memories and strife then cut her loose.

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:11 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

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