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Should i be mad or am i exagerating?? What would you do?? HELP!!

Ok sorry if its long.....My hubby let his mother borrow his credit so she can buy a house since her credit is messed up, so any who one of the temr in the cotract were that my husband has to live there for one year, which he is not and if they were to find out it can affect him big time. And not to mention his mom got the first home buyer help which if we get a house we wont get. OK so now me and hubby want a house, but now we cant get a loan cause he let his mom get a loan under his name so now he is not qualified for another one. I often warned him that if we ever wanted a house of our own we wont be able to get it, but he sill went on and let his mother borrow it. Not to mention they have every single bill under his name. Im furious cause i want my own house but we cant!!! And all hubby says is "I just wanted to help my mom get her dream house" which is four rooms,she dont need four just for her and her husband!!!!

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:30 PM on Jun. 7, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • I think that men really need to grow up if you want to help your non then do it your parents were ther for you you should be ther in return men just dont have a clue ther cliuless

    Answer by rosebub at 11:35 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • id be pissed!!

    Answer by LA09TKP at 11:36 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • How long has it been? Can they refinance and get the name transferred? I'm not sure how that works but he's got to get his name off the loan. Why is he subsidizing her? It's very dangerous because if she defaults on the loan it'll be his credit destroyed which takes years to get back. he did the nice thing and now he needs to extricate himself from being the signer for all her debt. ASAP!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:36 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • and you should be mad cuz he shouldnt of done that

    Answer by rosebub at 11:38 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • I'd be pissed too. If you were against it he should have discussed it with you. Maybe you two could have came up with a different solution. You two are married and what affects his credit, affects yours too. I understand him wanting to help his mom and that would have been fine if it didn't hurt your future. Also who is going to pay off the credit card she used?

    Answer by sadira29 at 11:41 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • I wouldnt be upset at all. I dont know, I was raised to believe that if I wanted something I could go out and get it myself and never to depend on a man to do anything.

    No disrespect but if you want a house try thinking of ways to put it under your own name. By asking about his credit, you are putting yourself in the same category as his mother. Show him that you are better than that.

    Good luck.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:54 PM on Jun. 7, 2009

  • Honestly, I wouldn't care. I agree with anon 11:54. If you want something, go out and get it yourself. I'm not sure how it works if youre married though(as for loans) but if you are planning on depending on his credit alone, that is just wrong. You cant really say anything about it because you aren't doing anything to help.

    Answer by youngfirsttimer at 12:00 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • I would be pissed. I would be pissed that he did that in the first place and would have done everything I could to talk him out of it. I think it's pretty messed up that his mother would even ask that of him to begin with. I could somewhat see co-signing the loan but not doing the entire loan as though he is buying the house. I mean if her credit is that bad, what makes him think she isn't going to ruin his credit, too? If you have a job, I would see about trying to buy a house on your credit. Although, if you are a SAHM, you are out of luck since you have no income. You will either have to go back to work and probably will have to work for at least a year in order for them to give you a home loan. Although my husband did get a loan 2 months after starting his new job, so you may be in luck, depending on your job. Also, I would try to do what Anon :36 said.

    Answer by Christina807 at 12:14 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • yea thats the bad some of the above stated that im doing the same by asking him to use his credit, well im a SHAM i dont work for now i just go to school so i obviously cant get a loan myself atleast not yet and we wanted a house now, and trust me i tried my hardest to get him not to do it... but he did

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:17 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • I think that is ridiculous and I would be super pissed as well. When you are married, there is no yours && his credit, to the state you two are one person, so this is your credit too that she is using. I would help my parents as much as I possibly could unless and until it affected my future. She should never have even asked him to do this for her && he never should have done it if you opposed it.

    Answer by HisMommySince07 at 12:30 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

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