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Do you think that kids of single moms "have better temper" compare to kids of married couples?

I'm not generalizing but it seems that couples tend to fight a lot in front of the children. Children of single mothers don't have to witness these kind of situations so it is understandable that these children won't learn to "fight" therefore would build a "better temper"

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:54 AM on Jun. 8, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • That hasn't been my personal observation, and I know lots of children of divorced parents. I have three sisters and 34 cousins (on one side of my family) all from broken homes, and I know lots of other kids from divorced parents. I'd say most of them have pretty hot tempers. A couple of my cousins and I have tempers that are very slow to emerge but then once they do a person better run (no violence but no tolerance either at that point). But the rest seem to blow up very quickly over things that really don't matter. Our single moms were pissed off and quick-tempered, taking out their frustrations on the ones who couldn't run away and didn't have a choice but to take it. All of our fathers were completely useless and never paid child support or did anything else to help. There are so many factors that go into a person's temperament that I don't think your question can be answered especially accurately.
    misses_nick

    Answer by misses_nick at 10:03 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • Nope I have never notice that before
    mamakirs

    Answer by mamakirs at 10:00 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • not at all. This is generalizing. Where do you get your information and statistics? Granted, I believe there are couples who fight relentlessly in front of their kids and I was one of those. I dont have a bad temper because of it, I just made a choice to change the dynamic in my house. Children of single parents dont have the benefit of a two parent home either. Theres problems that can arise with that as well. I dont believe that there is a set rule. Every family is different and has its own set of challenges. I have been married for 14 yrs and my hubby and I dont fight at all much less in front of our kids. We sometimes pick at one another in a loving way and with huge levels of sarcasm and if our kids even remotely think we are fighting or are serious, they go ballistic. We have literally sheltered them from any level of serious argument and they cannot handle it. I think tempers come from inner anger issues, not homelife.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 10:00 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • No. I'm a single parent, and my kids can argue with the best of them. lol Seriously, though, temperment and "fighting", I think are more of a personality thing than a what kind of household thing. You can learn to control it or try to change it, but if you're the type to argue or have a temper, then you will. Also, I don't agree that couples tend to fight a lot in front of their kids. My parents always took their fights to the bedroom, or outside, and usually after I was in bed. I never argued with my ex in front of my kids. I always told him we'd discuss it later, in private. Some couples do fight in front of the kids, I don't deny that, but I do think that you are generalizing in the way you put it.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 10:00 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • Working in daycare I have seen a lot of angry children from single mother homes as well as from two parent homes. Either way children get angry and will fight. I would say depending on home, at least in the two parent home they can see two adults working out the problem in the end but in the single home they see and feel lots of stress as mom has no one to vent to.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:02 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • Lots of single women have ex's of husbands and boysfriends and still fight in front of kids like marrieds. Relationships are about respect and that comes from I think people's low egos and appreciation of life, not only of the good life.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:04 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • Im living proof that children raised by single mothers dont always have better tempers. My mother has a bad temper. she often took things out on the kids. Im not saying this made me a bad person, but temper can get the best of me sometimes. growing up i learned to fight, my mother taught me ( i used to get bullied) & she told me that I better have their head on a platter or i was in for it. I feel that its harder for single mothers to also not fight because the fight you would sometimes have w/ a spouse( not helping around the house, putting the empty carton back in the fridge, complain about money) you argue with the kids about . I was 17 paying rent. getting smacked because i left the light on in the bedroom
    NiekaC

    Answer by NiekaC at 10:10 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • I can have a pretty bad temper sometimes and my parents NEVER fought in front of us! Even now, at 28, I have never heard my parents fight.
    My husband and I haven't fought in front of my son, and he at 9 months already has a temper. So I really don't think it matters.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:10 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • I don't think that very many couples have knock down drag out fights in front of their kids. I'm sure some do, but most don't. Most couples take it away from their kids.

    We frequently conduct healthy conflict resolution in front of our children. The kind where he tells me his opinion, I tell him mine and we come up with something we can both agree on. We believe that it's healthy for kids to learn how to "fight" effectively. They are always going to encounter people that they don't agree with and knowing how to fix problems without it getting out of hand is important.
    Cavalrybaby02

    Answer by Cavalrybaby02 at 10:14 AM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • That is generalizing, actually some of the angrier kids I have seen are because they have issues with mom and dad being apart. When me and my husband disagree it's okay for my kids to see that people disagree with each other and still love each other. Marriage isn't perfect, it shows kids we have to work on it. I'm not talking verbal abuse. Either way I don't condone verbal abuse in front of anyone. Together or single kids will have issues they need to work on.
    Steff107

    Answer by Steff107 at 10:18 AM on Jun. 8, 2009