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Any step-moms out there, after the bio-mom has died?

Hi everyone,
I'm new to CafeMom, but I need help. We were just informed that my husbands Ex-Wife died in her sleep Sunday morning. She was 26.
As of right now, her mom and dad have the baby (She'll be three in August), but after things calm down and we take custody, the fun will begin. lol. I'm just wondering if anyone else has/had gone through the same thing, and any suggestions?
I've asked my sister-in-laws kids to help make her a scrapbook of pictures of her mom, that way she's got something to go back and flip through. She's got a big family, and they won't let her forget anything. We want her family to be in her life, but the transition is nerve-wracking at the moment. We're in the middle of looking for a bigger place now, too, because a 1-bedroom just won't cut it now.


Answer Question

Asked by Seraphimred at 7:57 PM on Jun. 8, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • I think ur on the right track making sure she always has something left of her momma. She would have greatly appreciated that I'm sure. I have not personally been in ur situation, but I know if something happens to me, I want my kids to be happy & well taken care of. Seems that u already have all that covered... Just be there for that baby. She's gonna have a ton of questions that'll probably break ur heart tryin to answer, but she needs u now more than ever.

    Answer by bridgeh2o at 9:08 PM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • Thanks,
    I know if the roles were reversed, I'd want everything done for my child, so I'm trying to do that same thing.
    Another question:
    How do you tell a 3 year old mom isn't coming home?

    Answer by Seraphimred at 9:56 PM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • Idk... I guess that depends on ur religion. I personally would tell mine that their mom/dad is an angel who will watch over them everyday. That God will take good care of them, but they had some business to take care of in Heaven. That's hard...

    Answer by bridgeh2o at 10:43 PM on Jun. 8, 2009

  • I lost my dad when I was an infant. I cannot imagine losing a parent at 3 years old. But what I truly appreciated was all of the wonderful stories my mom would tell me about my biological father. I grew up with a very positive image of the wonderful man he was. It also helped foster my bond with the man my mother married (who also adopted me). Keep her mother as a major part of her life. Don't try to replace her... but rest assured, keeping her mom alive in her memory won't make you any less important to your step-daughter.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:41 AM on Jun. 9, 2009

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