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I need to help, but I dont know how!!!!

Im going to try to keep this as short as possible...My dad is a SEVERE alcoholic!! Im talking either a gallon of wine a day or a 5th of liquior. He has been an alcoholic for about 20 years. (amount of alcohol varried) It has caused so much havoc on his life its UNREAL! He worked for a construction/cabniet building company for 20 years...and they closed down after being open for 50 years. He is very talented (furniture builder) He has not worked since like 2000. He works odd jobs to barley pay bills and support his habit. I have begged him to go to rehab..(I could do it, without his permission) BUT he has no medical insurance. He told me it wouldnt do any good. He is probably right. Because he dont wanna quit. Neither me or my 2 brothers have a decent relationship with him. AND I have a 4 year old sister. I live so far away from him,(hubs military) what can I do?? It hurts me so bad to see this. How can I get him help?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:23 AM on Jun. 9, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • You cant help someone that doesn't want help...Sorry I know how you feel I too have a rageing alcoholic for a dad and he live 14 hours from me:(

    Answer by heather.darin at 10:25 AM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • You can't help someone who won't help themselves. Try going to alanon yourself.

    Answer by Carpy at 10:25 AM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • Why would I go?

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 AM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • because they give support and counseling to the loved ones of alcoholics as well as giving ideas to help their loved one.^^^^

    Answer by katie_s1 at 11:05 AM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • Alanon is not AA, it's specifically for children and spouses of alcoholics. I agree with everyone above who said there's really nothing you can do if he freely admits that he doesn't want to change. My only concern is that the four year old sister is not left in harm's way. If you suspect that she is in danger of abuse/neglect AT ALL you should fight to get custody of her. Best of luck to you and your family.

    Answer by Jodie118 at 11:30 AM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • I don't know where you live but in California there is Teen Challenge where a man can go and live for up to eighteen months and get some help with all his issues. He must be pretty discouraged to think he can't conquer his demons. He is not alone. You aren't either. Millions of people suffer addictions around our country. You can go to Alanon. He can seek help he he wants it. Pray for your dad but don't take him in. You don't need to bring that into your family life. Sometimes helping is hurting. He needs to find the help where he can. Many churches have programs for addicts and many pastors around the country are there for encouragement.

    Answer by grannywilson at 12:01 PM on Jun. 9, 2009

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