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r/r baby. . . .(military question)

So, my hubby was home for his two weeks of r/r and we got pregnant.

Well, he doesn't understand how they add on the two weeks for how far along you are. I've NEVER cheated on him. Never gave him a reason to eithor. But he doesn't understand how they do the time frame and whatever. I even got my period when he was home. So its not like there was any doubt about anything.

I told him today that the baby is measuring big, and all he asked was 'so when did you get pregnant then? i was only home ** weeks ago' and I tried to explain to him how they do the time frame. But he doesn't get it, and I can't get it through to him that I have been totally faithful this whole time.

Has anyone gone through this or anything similar? I just don't know what to do. Our babies are big, and he knows that. This is just so hard to deal with. .

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:42 PM on Jun. 9, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • get a test done, they can do a test while youre still pregnant, that might help a bit. but i dont know any other way, wish i could be more help

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:45 PM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • i haven't gone through anything like this. but i think you should email him some links to articles explaining how they figure out due dates etc...and send him a link to a website that will let him type in the date of your last period and give him the due date, and the estimated time frame of conception. (do it yourself before hand to be sure it is correct, if you send him a link to a site that isn't accurate and it comes back wrong he'll freak even more) maybe that will help him to understand a little more. and try to explain that all babies measure differently, so when they say he is measuring big it means he's just growing quicker than average babies. its got to be hard, i can't imagine if my dh said that to me while he was deployed i'd probably want to fly out and shoot him. but he'll come around and realize you are not doing anything wrong nor have you. just remember that he is stressed, he misses you and your kids CONT

    Answer by vabchmommy at 4:48 PM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • CONT and now he has to miss you being preg, and possibly (don't know how long he's gone) the birth of one of his children. i know before my husband left he was really stressing the fact that he wouldn't be here when our son was born. hes come around now, but we still have problems and i know they stem from that and the fact that our daughter is 3 1/2 and asks for him all the time and he feels guilty b/c he isn't here for us

    Answer by vabchmommy at 4:49 PM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • :Explain it a different way like they actually do it. Sure we are pregnant 9 months, but, its actually 10 lunar months and thats how they calculate it. Thats what both the doctors did for me when I was pregnant with my girls. Heres a link to show you


    Answer by Kat122 at 4:57 PM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • I went through a simular thing with this pregnancy. My hubby was gone for work up in jan, and I got my period while he was gone. I got pregnant one of the first nights he was home, but according to how they "count" your weeks, it looks Like I did while he was gone. Now, mind you, this is our THIRD child. I have explained to him over and over and over how gestational age is counted. It still took him a while to cope with it. I finally told him if he was going to be this way we would have a paternity test done when the baby was born and he would feel like a ass when it came back positive to be his. I think he finally got it when I said that. He knows me, and knows i didn't (and wouldn't) cheat on him.

    Answer by abbynzachsmommy at 5:11 PM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • I didn't go through that with my hubby but my mom and sister kept asking me question about my pregnancy. I was married for 7 weeks and with the added 2 weeks I was 9 weeks pregnant. For some reason they just couldn't believe that I conceived on my wedding night. Anyway. Will he get another r/r? Cause what you can do is have him talk to the doctor that you go to and have him/her explain how they add the two weeks on. If you can't do that just opt to have a paternity test done.

    Answer by WitchyLady27 at 5:34 PM on Jun. 9, 2009

  • **OP**

    Thanks girls. He'll be home soon, and he'll be able to talk to the dr and he'll be home for he *big* ultrasound. We're waiting until he comes home so he can feel like he is apart of this pregnancy still.
    I will send him that link, and check out another one or two and send them his way. No one in his unit has been cheated on (that we know of) but there are girls there that have been cheating, and I think it might be that that is bothering him. I dont know.

    Its so hard. we've been married for 5 years, and he is so insecure. Its so annoying. I can't wait until this deployment is over!!!!!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:14 PM on Jun. 9, 2009

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