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I love my mom but,

she and my dad are smokers. That's fine BUT they go out of their way to NOT smoke around my brother's kids b/c they have allergies & stuff. Well, so does my dd, but they still smoke around her. What's a nice way to tell her it bothers me?


Asked by Anonymous at 3:43 PM on Jun. 10, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I would sit them down and say "why is it you don't smoke around brother's kids, but you do around mine? Susie has allergies too, and it really bothers her, and us when you do this. I know you love Susie, but could you please refrain from smoking around her?" Maybe they do not realize that she has allergies, or that you are bothered by it. I hope they get the message and stop smoking around your child.

    Answer by MizLee at 4:18 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • just come out and say it. that's your kid and if you're worried about her health speak up.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:46 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • If it was MY mom i would right out say "why the heck do you not smoke when brothers kids are around, but you smoke in front of MY kid?" Your brother probably made it a serious point too. He may have said something like "if i find out your smoking in front of my kids, they will not come here". That statement is not out of line, it is VERY understandable. You have to lay down the law. Your allowing them to smoke in front of her really. If you put your foot down, they wouldn't be doing it.


    Answer by samurai_chica at 3:47 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • yeah my brother don't come around except on holidays b/c of the smoke... i don't want to be rude & my dd LOVES my parents

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:48 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • Tell her just what you told us.

    Answer by teamquinn at 3:50 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • Don't smoke around my kid. Tell them doctor's orders. Eat in non smoking sections of restaurants, walk away from those aroundyou who smoke in parks with baby and your parents. If you apply your needs to include the public at large and friends too your parents are more apt to listen to you. Remember there's a slight difference between smoking in a park and smoking in a home or car. The latter has to be more strictly adhered to. I have an asthmatic teen. It's very very hard. But health has improved and stays better with my rules followed so I stick to them no matter who's hurt.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:53 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • I'd probably say something like this: "I know you enjoy smoking, but I'd really rather that you didn't smoke around little Susie." if she says why, then you can explain about her allergies. If she still insists, then you can get into second hand smoke and how it is sad when your daughter comes home smelling of stale cigarette smoke.

    Answer by Bmat at 3:58 PM on Jun. 10, 2009


    Answer by older at 4:13 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • You do NOT have to say it in a nice way. Just say NO SMOKING around me and my family. NOT up for debate! My mom almost killed me with her smoke. My throat would swell shut and she thought I was faking gasping for air being a drama queen or something. When she finally found out I wasn't faking she quit smoking around me but it was in her car and in her apt. It was awful. She died of lung cancer (not a shock). Just tell her. If she's not happy she can go smoke elsewhere.

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:33 PM on Jun. 10, 2009