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How Can I Teach My Daughters About Women's Bodies Without Freaking Out?

My daughters are 2 and 4 years old, and I feel like I've done a good job telling them about that their bodies including that girls have vaginas and boys have penises.

The other night, while in the tub, my 2 year old was exploring herself and discovered her clitoris. Her older sister shouted "Mommy, Jo-Jo has a penis!" I then had to explain to Dew that she didn't have a penis, but a clitoris and that all girls and women have this inside of their vaginas. (Yes, I know the more correct term is vulva.) Dew than asked "Even you?" I said yes, and she asked when she grows up will she have a penis. I said "no, you will still have a vagina but it will have hair on it like Mommy's." This seemed to satisfy her. End of convo. The only thing is that I was TOTALLY FREAKED OUT BY THIS CONVERSATION. I don't want to appear apprehensive or nervous, because I don't want my girls feeling like they can't ask me questions. What should I do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:24 PM on Jun. 10, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (5)
  • It sounds like you handled it very well. You probably seemed much calmer to them than you felt.

    Answer by TweenAndTwinMom at 6:30 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • Well, I think you handled it well! It's uncomfortable for you because you associate those parts of your body with sex, but little kids don't know about sex, so they're just asking innocent questions trying to understand their bodies. Just keep your answers short and simple, but don't dumb it down too much. Little kids can still tell when they're being patronized. So keep it to the point. Like you said, you gave her an answer and the conversation ended, and that's how it will most likely continue to be. I don't think you should be embarrassed yet... wait until she's a teenager and you're giving her the safe sex talk and begging her to let you know when she needs to be on birth control to be embarrassed! lol

    Answer by motherofanaries at 6:33 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • i agree it sounds like you did a good job. just keep your answers at whatever you want them to know, and go from there. i feel the same way when my daughter asks questions like this, shes about the same age, and hubby says i handle it well, he says he's never been able to tell that i'm freaking out on the inside, so i'm sure your girls couldn't tell either.

    Answer by vabchmommy at 6:41 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • You did great!

    Answer by gdiamante at 8:26 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

  • I agree w/ all the pps. You did awesome!

    Answer by MotherofIreland at 11:23 PM on Jun. 10, 2009

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