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Am I the only one Going through this?

Ok all couple's go throug hard times. My hubby works and im a SAHM i dont have any family of my own both my parents have passed away and then i have a MIL who would rather live her teenage years...Anyway's my question is im so unhappy in my marriage because of little things like no romance, Sex just feel's like another chore and yes ive told my Dh another is our credit me being a sahm dont really have any and his he doesnt care to improve it i mean i guess he just thinks it will just resolve on it's own..Someday i want to be financially stable and i just dont think i will have that with him, My youngest starts school this fall and i want to go to nursing school because i dont want to have to depend on someone through out life....Are all these little things really worth giving up a marriage or am i just overwhelmed ive felt like this for a few yrs now and i think the only thing that keeps me sane is my kiddo's.

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Asked by Anonymous at 10:12 AM on Jun. 12, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • Your hubby should support you and whatever you do. Talk to him about it and if he doesn't, then I would tell him that you can't be with him then without any support in what you wanna do in life. Good luck.

    Answer by Ambie0526 at 10:20 AM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • You're grouping every thing together. Why don't you just look at each thing as it's own thing. Yes, you should go to school when your child does....look at the future that it holds! You can do school loans, and probably get a school schedule that won't disrupt your home life too much either (thinking child care). Too bad you don't have your parents, but you're an adult, and they'd only be extended family have a nuclear family to think of. He's not concerned with his credit? Well, perhaps he's never been shown why or how to care about it. I don't see any of these as marriage breaking.

    Answer by EireLass at 10:20 AM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • I think you probably just feel overwhelmed. Does he support you going to school? I'd do it, as another person mentioned, you can go when your child does. Not only will that help you in terms of giving you something to do and make you feel better about yourself, but it will also give you something that can help YOU personally be more financially stable and then IF, years from now, you decide that the marriage isn't working, you can take care of yourself and your child(ren). I would not end the marriage right now, though, b/c I think you're just frustrated and given some time, and some small changes, you might find that things are not as bad as you feel they are right now.

    Answer by tropicalmama at 10:43 AM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • I would talk to him about exactly how unhappy you are, but I know with my own marriage, I never understood what my DH was talking about when he said he was unhappy because I was happy. I didn't realize that his opinion of our marriage mattered because he came from a divorced home and my parents were together, so obviously I knew better than he did! That can be tough to overcome, for me it was like an epiphany.

     Things can be tough when your kids are small to find time for each other it does get better. I agree with Eirelass. I heard nothing to break up a marriage over, the grass isn't always greener on the other side. My Dh works a lot too, and I am just thankful he's working, especially now with so many out of work and makes good money to take care of us all.


    Answer by Lesli at 10:59 AM on Jun. 12, 2009

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