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who am i supposed to believe?!

so me and my boyfriend have been having problems with his ex girlfriend texting and calling him all the time. i told her several times to stop talking to him and i was very nice about it. then i let it go for a little while and i found out shes still texting him. so i emailed her and asked her AGAIN to stop. and she said he talks to her just as much as she talks to him, but he tells me he doesn't talk to her. who am i supposed to believe?! this whole thing wouldn't be a problem if she was completely over him but she's not, she's still in love with him!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:34 PM on Jun. 12, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (16)
  • Your boyfriend needs to put a stop to it. If he doesn't, that should tell you something.

    Answer by LuvBug3 at 12:36 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • Here is a simple thing to do.

    Grab his latest cell phone statement. Don't look at his incoming calls, check his outgoing calls. If her number is on there more than it should be, you know who to believe.
    Are you on the cell phone plan/account? If so, go to your provider and ask for the last month or two worth of texting print outs. That will also tell you all you need to know.

    FYI - I was in a similar situation with my SO and his ex when we first got together, and in the end it turned out that he was still f*cking her and letting her believe they were gonna "work it out"

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 12:38 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • i can't get to his phone statements because we don't live together.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:40 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • Do you never have access to his house? Does he ever take a shower when you are there, allowing you a few minutes alone to check it out?

    Come on now, there is always a way.

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 12:41 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • Oh, also, if you get a chance to check his phone sometime...

    My SO's phone will hold a record of 60 calls coming in, and 60 calls going out. But he never knew that, and he would delete her calls from his phone. So if I checked his phone, and there were, say, only 57 calls outgoing, and 54 calls incoming, i knew that he had called her 3 times that day and she had called him 6. Then i would ask him something like, "How's Natalie today?" and when he would say he didn't know, I would say something like "You talked a couple times today, how could you not know?"
    He could never figure out how I knew, lol, it was basically awesome.

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 12:45 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • HE needs to be the one to cut ties with her...and if he refuses, he's obviously still got ties with her and/or feelings....and if that's the case you NEED TO LEAVE HIS SORRY ASS!

    Answer by carliemarie1015 at 12:46 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • This is your boyfriends fault. Even though it is disrespectful of her to be calling him or texting him now that hes in a new relationship, it isnt her fault and she obviously, like many women, cant control her feelings. Your boyfriend obviously cant either, if he isnt doing anything or saying anything about it then you need to leave him because lord only knows whats going on when you aren't around. Good luck.

    Answer by youngfirsttimer at 12:48 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • I was in a similar situation, although my SO wasn't responding to the bi&^%es e-mails. If he respects your relationship, he will tell her that she needs to stop contacting him, that it is inappropriate, and it's O-V-E-R. and i suggest you say something to the ex again. I let this chick send my SO freakin' messages on myspace for a year before i said anything, 'cause she wasn't calling or anything, but after we were together for over a year, i was just like, listen honey - you gotta stop. and my SO did end up responding to a message letting her know that she was in the wrong and needed to get over herself.

    Answer by Wheepingchree at 12:48 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • He needs to quit responding and block her. He is probably the one lying and most likely is texting back. I would dump him before you get knocked up by him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:57 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • no i really never go to his house, unless he needs to do something for his parents when im with him. but there is always someone home so it's not like i can snoop around. and i just told him i want him to text her and tell her to stop talking to him and i want to see the text. so we'll see what happens

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:58 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

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