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Baby Mama Drama !

Ok so my bf and his baby mama have a 10 year old son together. I don't mind that they talk, BUT I do mind when they talk on a personal level. I get a feeling that they still have an emotional relationship going on. 2 days after he found out I was pregnant he went to the casino and got drunk. He called her the same night to tell here that we were expecting a baby and she told him that that's a good thing and she walk glad that he got over her. She also told him that she didn't love him anymore and she didn't want him back and he should move on with his life. What guy calls his baby momma and tells her things like that before he has even told his own family? Also lately he has been talking to her a couple times a week and I found out they had been talking through his son, who lives with us. When I asked him about it he just looked shocked and surprised and ask me how I knew that they had talked. What do you guys think ?

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NiNio9

Asked by NiNio9 at 3:45 PM on Jun. 12, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I think it was not very smart for you to get involved with a guy who already had a child. It sounds like he is still in love with her and now you have to deal with that. How do you think these things are going to affect you and your child? Because it does not matter how you feel about her or the child, you have to be nice for the sake of the children.
    kemclaughlin

    Answer by kemclaughlin at 4:09 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • he should of gotten over her already but looks like it isn't sweetie you are on a bumpy road it make get worse and it maybe be ok but the thing is will he marry you and the question is prolly no cause he is still thinking of her sorry sweetie. but only you know whats best for you and if you leave him he will think harder but i would sit him down and tell him what you think of the r-ship with her an him and the thing between you and him
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:24 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • I think if you are not just out for a piece of ass, it is only natural to have a life long emotional attachment to the parent of your child. You are right however, they should discuss only that which pertains to the son and that is about it. I would be very honest but not threatening. Tell him you understand his need to communicate with her regarding the child, but it needs to end there. For him to carry on a personal relationship with her is not only suspect, but very unfair to you. My DH and his DD's mom were together for 7 yrs, so it stands to reason they were close at one time. She did in the begining try to talk to him about some crap envolving mutual friends and I put a stop to it. He is no longer her "friend" and she needs to take that crap somewhere else. Be firm yet respectful of the fact that they share a child. Good luck. BTW DH did tell her about our baby right away, wanted to get it over with.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 4:28 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • honestly., i think they think we're stupid. but we know better. i can understand them talking bc of their son but not on a personal level. congrats on the baby and good luck.
    BekaBug

    Answer by BekaBug at 5:20 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • They sound like they will always love each other in some way. It takes a woman with a lot of self confidence and a strong relationship to not let it become an issue.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:22 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • It sounds like he has feelings for her. I mean, I think most decent people will always have feelings for someone they had a child with, even if things turn sour. It doesn't sound like he's over it, so its just whether you can deal with that or not. I think you have to talk in a frank way with him- that this other relationship is over and he needs to spend time bonding with you and not talking socially with her. If he loves you, he'll put you before her. It may be a situation where it'll take him some time alone to stop wishing for the past, or else everyone he loves will be in his past.
    mrs_pulley

    Answer by mrs_pulley at 5:40 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

  • Sounds like they are friends. She clearly has ZERO romantic feelings for her, so what are you worried about?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:15 PM on Jun. 12, 2009

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