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How old did you let your daughter start dating?

My daughter is 15 & 1/2 and we told her no dating until 16 well when shes 16 and she has a boyfriend what do you think she should be allowed to do. Like go to his house, him over ours, going out in public, going down the shore together? She growing up so fast what did you let you daughter do?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:41 AM on Jun. 14, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (14)
  • I my self don't have a teen daughter/son (my sons only 9 months) but i'd like to share my opinion. Id say him over to yours, not allowed in her room with him espcially with the door closed. If the shore is a public area where other people would be around i'd say ok. Going out in public like to eat, movies is ok (not trying to scare you, but things can happen in a theater). Set ground rules, like having to be home by 10, keeping up her grades, maybe before she can date they guy you have to meet him (my mom did that with me). I would suggest getting her on BC, not saying she's going to be having sex, but just as a percaution, teens do tend to do thinks without thinking. If you do get her on BC tell her, it not that you approve of her doing it, you would rather her wait till shes married, but if on the off chance she does do it, less chance of being a teen mom.
    vgiron

    Answer by vgiron at 9:53 AM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • My daughter will be 16 next Sunday. She has had a bf for about 2 months now. He is a boy that she has been friends with for 2 years. A good kid from a good family. They always did everything in a group, the mall, movies, beach, hanging out at someones house, ect. They went on one "date" just the 2 of them to the movies about 1 month ago. Because we know him and family and trust them both we allowed it. Sixteen was always the rule. We have had may talks about what is expected of her at this age and beyond. Which is so important, also very hard. Some conversations are difficult but very important. Those lines of communication are hard to keep open.
    Just let her know you trust her to do the right thing and she can always come to you. Be honest with her and hopefully she'll be honest with you.
    Good Luck.
    wallmom1

    Answer by wallmom1 at 9:55 AM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • my daughter was 16 when she started dating. if she was not home by 10 pm. she was grounded for 2 weeks and i had to know where they were going. or they had to double with friends. they have to gain your trust and you have to be able to trust them. just remember when you were 16 what were you doing?
    hcashe216

    Answer by hcashe216 at 10:09 AM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • Wallmom has things nice..She knows his family. I think that's what you should do. Make an effort to know his parents. If your DD is going to spend time at his house call his parents to make sure they are home and know the plans. Dates should be planned not just hanging out together everyday doing nothing. Driving range, movies, pool, bowling, beach, lunch/dinner. Make an effort to invite him to dinner and fun things with the family.
    Farrahann

    Answer by Farrahann at 10:12 AM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • Just want to add..I didn't grow up with any rules and left to my own devices I started dating at 16.
    Farrahann

    Answer by Farrahann at 10:14 AM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • My mom let me and my sister date when we started high school. When I started I was 14, but I wasnt interested in dating at that age, I didnt really care for boys. My first actual relationship was when at the end of my sophmore year, and it was silly.

    I think they should do it whenever they are ready, dont give ridiculous age limits like 18 or 35 lol, because they will want it more. Let them learn from there own mistakes because guys are stupid and no one can disagree, and she will get hurt, all you can do is be there =).


    I think 15 is okay to have a boyfriend.
    MammaBella

    Answer by MammaBella at 11:53 AM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • I have the 16 rule also, and take it slowly in the beginning. I want the chance to get to know the person my kids are seeing, I limit alone time in the beginning, but loosen those restrictions as the relationship progress's. I don't agree dates should be planned and full of activities, that isn't realistic, and impossible for most people to afford on a regular bases. Take the time to find the good in the person your DD is picking, sometimes we look for the negative, we want to protect our kids and I think this is a natural reaction.

    You know your DD better then anyone else, I have 3 teens and I do not have set rules that apply to all, they are different individuals so rules apply individually, there are core rules but I have to change certian aspects to fit each kid. FOllow your DD's lead, she will let you know when she is ready for more alone time.
    luckysevenwow

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 11:59 AM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • I don't have daughters, just sons, and they were allowed group dates at 16 and one on one dating at 17. The same rules would have applied to a daughter.
    tracylynnr67

    Answer by tracylynnr67 at 12:00 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • My daughter is only 2 but I have a SIL who will be 17 in August. She lived with my husband and I for quite awhile and I feel very maternal towards her. Anyways, I feel like 16 is a fair age to begin dating as long as there are strict guidelines. Such as..you must always know who, what, when, where and why,. Also grades must be kept at a certain level and to keep involved with her other friends and activities just as much as before she started dating. Keeping consistant with rules is key. If your rule is 3.0or higher to date and she comes home with a 2.9 then no dating til GPA is back to where it should be...JMO
    KaireasMommy

    Answer by KaireasMommy at 12:57 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • luckyseven...my reasoning for planning is so the boy doesn't become the center of her world and all she wants to do is spend every moment with him. I meant planned time. The activities are just things they could do away from home as oppose to parking a car at a dead end.
    Farrahann

    Answer by Farrahann at 12:58 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

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