Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What is child support monies for?

My EX is always complaining when I ask him to buy the kids something pay have of activities... He says that is what his child support is for... Seriously its kinda crazy the nickle diming. It was his weekend with the kids they had a birthday party he expected me to get the gift for it... I told him kids have parties on my weekend too... I pay for it... Isnt child support for housing/food/clothing....

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:20 PM on Jun. 14, 2009 in Money & Work

Answers (9)
  • housing food clothing sports toys activies
    anything that involes the child
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:26 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • Basic necessities. See clearly: NECESSITIES.....food, shelter, clothing. That's really all the child NEEDS. Anything extra, is just that. Extra. You should split all their extra curricular activities.....clubs, sports, lessons, etc. BUT....that would be in a perfect world.
    EireLass

    Answer by EireLass at 1:30 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • EireLass ~ lol so true... excellent answer ~
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:49 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • Yup, my ex was the same way. He never spend a cent on the kids when they were little because he said, "use the child support". That was fine, except when they started school. With lessons, supplies, etc. etc.. It was difficult. He never really helped me at all. And the kicker, child support would come some months and some months not. I finally had to turn him into Child Support Enforcement. But even then, if he was not working, there was nothing that could be done.
    I feel for ya all that have to go through this now. Mine are grown and it's been several years since he finally finished paying it off. Not Fun!
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 1:59 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • Child support is to HELP pay for the childs needs it is not to pay for 100% of the childs needs. There is no reason if a woman gets support she doesn't have the money to have a b-partf for the child. Sounds like the mother is wasting the money that is supposed to go towards the childs needs.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:25 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • When it comes to buying gifts that's not part of child support he should want to do that from the heart. Does that mean they have to eat less for the month because you bought the gift with their money? He's just being petty and mad because he has to pay in the first place.
    HoneyPot78

    Answer by HoneyPot78 at 7:23 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • The extra's aren't part of the support, BUT IMO too many women sign their kids up for "extras" (dance, ball, classes ect.) without consulting the father first and just tell them "oh btw you need to give me X amount of money for this because I had to pay it" like it was a nessecity of life. It isn't. If you want the dad to pay half of the extra activities, then it needs to be discussed before hand. He may not have the money for the extras. He shouldn't be forced to pay for baseball or dance when he can't afford it and i'm sure if the tables were turned a lot of you would feel the same way.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:59 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • It's for ANYthing for your child. It is NOT for anything for YOU.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:41 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

  • Anon741 the OP didn't say anything about buying things for herself. Stop being nasty.

    As for the OP's question If he is taking a child to birthday parties on his weekends he should pay for the gift himself. CS money is to support your child not buy presents for another child. If its that big of a deal send the birthday child a card and nothing else then tell your ex that you are sorry that is all you could afford if he would like to get the child an extra present he needs to himself. Trust me he will!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:30 PM on Jun. 14, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN