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Am I wrong for not wanting to have my husbands family at my DDs first Birthday?

All they do when they are together if fight....his sister and mom constantly argue and get me IN THE MIDDLE....his brother-in-law is addicted to pain killers...they have 3 kids that are ok but my DD doesn't really know them...wouldn't it just be ok to have the 4 or 5 family members that my DD knows and likes and that don't argue to be there? Or am I obligated since they are family?? My husband doesn't care to see them either....he hardly ever talks to his mom b/c of all the drama. I REALLY don't want my DDs first birthday ruined!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:27 AM on Jun. 15, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Answers (4)
  • If DH is ok w/ them not coming, go w/ that. Have fun, when mama aint happy, aint nobody happy, remember. Gl.

    Answer by KARRIEMARIE at 10:32 AM on Jun. 15, 2009

  • Please invite them. It will affect your relationship with them forever if you don't. You could, if you wish, have a small party with just your little family and then a bigger party with all of the relatives, but don't hurt his family's feelings by excluding them.

    Answer by Bmat at 10:51 AM on Jun. 15, 2009

  • I would say invite them... especially his mother. That is grandbaby... Just tell everyone in a polite way ahead of time that if anyone starts agruing they will be asked to leave. And set your mind to have a possitive attitute about the day even if that happens... if they argue and are asked to leave, just shake it off as soon as they are gone and continue to have fun and enjoy your little ones birthday! Harder said then done I know, but possible and so worth it! Maybe if they know they wont be able to stay if they argue they will find a way to put difference aside and maybe it can be a turning point....

    Answer by mrsbvader at 12:37 PM on Jun. 15, 2009

  • I am in a similiar boat. My son's birthday is on the 17th. We're going to have a small, personal party on the 20th... just my immediate family, those who were a huge, huge part of my son's first year. Then on the 27th, I invited everyone over to my moms house for a bigger birthday celebration, so everyone has the chance to see him. Sometimes you gotta be the bigger person and set aside the personal difference for the sake of keeping peace in the family. Your daughter deserves to see her other family as well, even though she may not remember them. If it turns into a huge fight, ask them to quit it or leave if they cannot get along. Remind them that the party is about your DD not them. Just keep your focus on your DD and have fun.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:50 PM on Jun. 15, 2009

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