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My 12 year will not sleep alone it is causing problems in my boyfriend of 5 years HELP!

I sleep in my daughter's room every night, I have lived with my boyfriend for 5 years and probably have slept in are bed for about 5 months total. It is putting a big strain on are relationship. He says I baby her. She has horrorable panic attacks that bring us to the hospital on a monthy basis. HELP!

 
linnyluhu

Asked by linnyluhu at 10:07 AM on Jun. 16, 2009 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • She needs to be in counseling to find the root of the panic attacks. Once they stop then you can go back to your own bed
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:46 AM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • I can't really say I blame him.

    It sounds like she never learned to self soothe and that probably contributes to her panic attacks. You really need to speak to her doctor about ways she can clam herself or in a worst case scenario, discuss medication.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:39 AM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • She needs professional help. She's 12 and old enough to sleep alone.
    abbynzachsmommy

    Answer by abbynzachsmommy at 10:57 AM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • I think you need to find out what is causing the panic attacks- I suggest counseling. Does she fear being alone? Does she have any siblings that can share a room with her? My 10yr old son does not like to be alone- even in the bathroom. He drags our cat (or the 3yr old) in there with him. Do you have any pets that can sleep with her and help calm her?
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 11:21 AM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • i suggest counseling if she haveing panick attacks there is someing going on in her head that is causeing them...maybe the dr can give her a anxiety medican to help control them...i took something starting with c i cant remeber exactly ive been off it a while...also they might put her on something to help her sleep to...i dont usally suggest a child taking these meds but if it help then it worth it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:31 PM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • I would suggest hypnotherapy for panic attacks -- they're so similar to phobias, and they have simliar causes. Counselling may help, but hypnosis will. Find someone registered and make sure they record the sessions and give her a copy of the recording. You can even be there with her, if that helps her relax.

    Otoh, I think boyfriends who think their neediness comes before their girlfriend's children are asking for a mommy, not a partner. He joined your relationship the way it was, and now he's expecting it to be different. Does he want you to colour your hair, too?
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 1:10 PM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • Was this happening before your boyfriend came into the picture?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:29 PM on Jun. 16, 2009

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