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how do you get an adult child to get help

25 lives at home has a lying problem. spends too muchmoney. needs to get life together but blames everyone but himself. its all my fault. hes depressed. but doesnt think he needs help. thinks i am reaising him by a book and that is dumb. all he needs is a little help. but how.


Asked by annie55 at 3:48 PM on Jun. 16, 2009 in Adult Children (18+)

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This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • tell him to make a plan for his life and show it to you. then ask him how he is going to meet those goals. give suggestions or guidance but don't do it for him. praise him for each small thing he does. he'll be fine

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:23 PM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • Does he have a job?

    Answer by pinkgemini85 at 3:53 PM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • I know this wont be easy but have a talk with him he wont listen and boot him out it might just be the only way he can learn is the fall on his butt, tell him you will help him with certain things but you are not a bank account for him, he is old enought to stop blaming everybody and start forgiving the past and make a future, If you think he needs to be on pills, there is no way to force that and him getting pushed into it, because it will just make it worse because he will probably start to abuse them just to make others mad and say it's there fault. You have to stand up to him Hes your kid your not his.

    Answer by NicholeAT at 3:55 PM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • #1 tell him to get a job & stop giving him money.
    #2 even if it's only $200 a month have him pay rent so he can learn responsibility-
    he don't pay kick him out.!
    #3 allow him to be an adult he should be able to come & go as he pleases.
    you are no doing him any favors by treating him like a child- he should be doing all his own cooking, cleaning, laundry. He should have his own phone or pay half of your phone bill.
    the best thing you can do for him is allow him to grow-up pay rent & phone bill.

    Answer by maiahlynn at 4:00 PM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • Kick him out! You didnt list any medical reasons why he should be having to live at home at 25 years old! That is just plain rediculous!!

    Quit enabling him and make him get out on his own and see what the real world is like. He wont have the money to spend if he has to actually pay for all of his living expenses.

    Ok bash me now! My parents showed me tough love at 18 and kicked me out 2 days after I turned 18 with no where to go. I hated them then but now at 28 I see why they did what they did.

    If you choose for your son to still live at home this late in life then the help that he is getting is from you!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:03 PM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • Tell him to help or get the F out.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:15 PM on Jun. 16, 2009

  • Turn on Dr Phil right now! ;)

    Answer by mom2twobabes at 4:20 PM on Jun. 16, 2009